Pop-Preview: WWE’s Money in the Bank

michael dworkis previews the new wwe ppv..

 

This year the Money in the Bank pay-per-view has an interesting yet empty feel to it. There are a number of matches, but of course at the aptly-named event, we look forward most to the Money in the Bank Ladder matches.

This year is just confusing. The WWE Championship ladder match features only four superstars, while the ladder match for the World Title has eight superstars.

The four lucky contestants to vie for the WWE Title are John Cena, Kane, Big Show, and Chris Jericho. Cena in a MITB match? I do not mean this as a major knock against the Cenation leader, but I felt this MITB was left untarnished until now. I do not want to see him in a MITB. Jericho, yes. Kane, yes. Big Show… eh, I could live. Cena? If he wins, I will throw my hands in the air. I always thought Money in the Bank was meant for guys Edge, Punk, and The Miz, people who were just on the edge of hitting the main event but not quite there yet. Cena… what on Earth does he have to gain by being in this match? Oh, right. The gimmick is that he wants to stop the Big Show. Whatever. Jericho should win this match. Whether he does or not remains to be seen.

 

Now, the World Title ladder match is what Money in the Bank is all about. Dolph Ziggler, Cody Rhodes, A-Tra… I mean, Lord Tensai, Damien “I stole the gimmick of The Genius” Sandow, Sin Cara, Christian, Santino Marella, and Tyson Kidd. First off, Tyson Kidd in Money in the Bank? AWESOME! He will not win, he will not even come close, but if you want to see some awesome high-risk stunts off a ladder, this guy will deliver! One might think I should say the same for Sin Cara, but he sucks. I am sorry, I am not in the mood to sugar-coat or even try to be nice. I hate him. He is Rey Mysterio-lite, and not even half as good. I would rather see Hornswoggle. He botches his moves constantly. Fire him already.

 

Santino, nope. Tensai, nope. I really like A-Train, but the Tensai gimmick is a bit ridiculous, and is holding him back. Let him go back to being the “Rabbi of Wrestling” as Paul Heyman would call him, and let Albert just maul everyone in his way. Money in the Bank will not be it, but it will be a start. Christian could win, but I do not see another World Title run in his future. He was given the belt out of respect to Edge and his retirement, but Christian is just not quite there yet to be main event material again. Cody Rhodes, Dolph Ziggler, and Damien Sandow are my three picks to potentially win. Sandow brings back some of the classic feel of wrestling to the squared circle. Sure, he is using a gimmick from the 80’s and early-90’s which no one remembers, that of The Genius, but it still works and still gets the fans riled up. Ziggler wore the World Title once, on a technicality. I have said it before and I have said it again, he is ready to be World Champion again. The belt looked good on him and it really needs to be his time. Cody Rhodes would be the shocker. Since losing the Intercontinental Title, he has not really done much to impress me, but MITB is where he could do it. It would be a surprise if he won, but it would be a welcome one.

 

We have the YouTube exclusive pre-show Tag Team Title match of champions R-Truth and Kofi Kingston defending against Camacho and Hunico. I have not seen much of this team, and they should actually have a name. They might get more attention. It does seem the WWE Tag Team division is starting to get more attention, but there is not enough for people to really care. Hell, I do not care. Truth and Kingston are singles wrestlers who should be in MITB matches. At least they are not defending against The Primetime Players who are made of “millions of dollars” or so says their manager, A.W. The gimmick is that when the fight gets too tough and not in their favor, they bail out on the match and take a count-out loss. Really, really dumb gimmick. Make teams who dominate and make you want to see Tag Team matches. Can someone go back in time and bring over tag teams from the 80’s and 90’s? Demolition, Money Inc., the Beverly Brothers, The Road Warriors (Legion of Doom), The Quebecers, and even The Orient Express? Those were good teams, and fans wanted to watch.

We have our two main title bouts. Sheamus up defending against Alberto del Rio and another instant classic, Daniel Bryan challenges C.M. Punk for the WWE title.

It is time for Alberto to be champion. Sheamus has had a really good run, but I want the modern-day Rick Martel to hold the gold again. Nothing against the first Irish-born champion, but I love Alberto del Rio and putting the belt back on him increases his stock ten-fold. His injury set him back, and I think overall fans do not see him as an intimidating heel anymore. Put that belt on him, and trust me, it will turn heads.

 

Punk vs. Bryan round 17! I do not care! Make it the WWE title match of every pay-per-view for all I care. Each and every time they wrestle, it is nothing less than awesome. Now, some time ago I looked down on the involvement of A.J. as part of the strange love triangle. Well, I warmed up to it, and now I am in love with her. The gimmick… the love triangle… no, I meant… forget it. Meh, my wife does not read my columns anyway. She disagrees with me more than Bobby Heenan and Gorilla Monsoon. We last saw the resident “crazy chick” slap both Punk and Bryan. She is the guest ref. For all we know, she could hate them both and never count a single pinfall. Which means this match could last forever. FOREVER! That is longer than a Ring of Honor match, and those go pretty long too! Once again, I will say what I have said about every Bryan and Punk match. The true winners are the fans. I will say though, if there is a time for a title change, this would be the time to do it. Would it matter? Probably not, because we will get more of these two wrestling, just someone else wearing the belt. It will be AWESOME.

There you have it, and I am sure there will be a Diva title match which no one except lonely saps living in basements, the merchandise, and concession stands will care about.

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