joel wosk loves waffles …
To call the relationship between ISIS agents Sterling Archer and Lana Kane “complicated” would be a grand understatement. Over the course of the series, we have learned that they were once romantically involved. Sadly, their relationship failed because there simply wasn’t enough room in Archer’s life to accommodate both Lana and his massive ego, not to mention his profound “mommy issues.” Since the breakup, their interactions are consistently hostile and grow even more so when Archer continuously infers that Lana is still in love with him. In her defense, Archer is a monumental ass literally every waking minute of his life, and yet in spite of this massive character flaw, his proficiency at the art of spy craft still makes him attractive to her. Lana’s relationship with ISIS accountant Cyril Figgis hasn’t faired much better, with Cyril’s crippling jealousy issues and his repeated inability to keep his pants on while in the company of other women. In short, Lana has some pretty serious issues with the men in her life. This week’s episode finds Lana and Archer in a most uncomfortable position once again when they have to go undercover as newlyweds in an effort to stop a group of North Korean agents who are attempting to purchase some enriched uranium.
In the opening scene of the episode, Lana and Archer are checking in at the front desk of a luxurious hotel while decked out in a wedding dress and tuxedo, respectively. Archer is already wasted on champagne (for those of you who have been following this series, this should not come as a surprise) and Lana has already run out of patience. Archer is also reveling in his role as Lana’s husband because he is convinced that Lana is obsessed with him. Meanwhile, back at ISIS, insufferable office gossip, Pam, is sewing the seeds of discontent by suggesting to the already sensitive Cyril that Archer and Lana are engaging in all sorts of sexual activity while holed up in their honeymoon suite. In spite of his best efforts to ignore Pam, Cyril is eventually persuaded to accompany Pam and Cheryl to the hotel to spy on Lana and Archer.
Back in the honeymoon suite, Lana is all suited up for action and observing several video monitors showing the activity of the North Korean agents in their room. While Lana is actually doing her job, Archer is soaking in the room’s giant bathtub, bemoaning the fact that his room service Steak Au Poivre hasn’t come with peppercorns while drinking $300 bottles of scotch. Lana is understandably frustrated with Archer. But in his defense, Steak Au Poivre does need to include pepper by definition. While all this is happening, Cyril, Pam, and Cheryl are in a room on the other side of the complex spying on Archer and Lana. Pam is trying her very best to put the idea into Cyril’s mind that Lana and Archer are about to go wild with passion.
Lana finally has enough of Archer’s unprofessionalism and decides to carry on without him by scaling the outside of the building to place a Geiger counter on the window outside the North Korean agents’ room in order to detect the presence of the uranium they are there to buy. Archer soon follows her up there, not to help mind you, but to argue with her. In the middle of their argument, Lana loses her grip and starts plummeting to her death. Archer, in quite spectacular fashion, dives through the air and manages to save Lana’s life. They both make it back into the building and start to argue once again when the North Korean agents suddenly overtake them. Archer and Lana manage to break free from their bonds but only escape to the bathroom where they find themselves trapped without an exit.
Luckily for them, Cyril has been watching the scene unfold and seizes the opportunity to be a hero and save Lana. He bursts through the door of the North Korean’s room and starts spraying a fire extinguisher to create a blinding fog so Archer and Lana can flee from the bathroom under some kind of cover. Lana succeeds in eliminating the enemy agents but is disgusted by Cyril’s inability to trust her, and with Archer for just for being himself. In the end, their mission is a failure (a common occurrence actually) because they failed to identify the source of the uranium. However, in the closing scene, we find out that Dr. Krieger of ISIS was behind the sale the whole time because his depravity knows no limits.
There are only four episodes left in this season of Archer and we still have yet to see the ultimate confrontation between Archer and his arch nemesis, The Bionic Barry. There have been several hints and subplots throughout the season, but since their standoff at the end of season three, they haven’t actually been in the same room together. The suspense leading up to their eventual battle is killing me because the hatred shared between these two men (well, more like man vs. cyborg) is so sweet you could pour it all over your waffles. And now I’ve made myself hungry. For carnage. And waffles … delicious waffles.
Check out Archer on FX, Thursdays at 10pm.
all photos credit fx networks