TV Review: Ambrose is RAW Genius

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Special note: Tonight kicks off WWE’s month-long promotion of their support for the Susan G. Komen Foundation during Breast Cancer Awareness Month. White and pink ring ropes, all employees wearing the pink ribbon. I have to say, when WWE supports a great cause, they do it right. Props to them.

Tonight, Hulk Hogan will be live on RAW!

RAW kicks off live in Chicago with very loud CM Punk chants. The Authority begin the show talking about quitters, obvious jab at CM Punk, then turn attention to Dean Ambrose. Stephanie is interrupted by Paul Heyman who shifts the conversation towards Brock Lesnar and the implication he was about to tap out, and blames The Authority for Seth Rollins attempting to cash in. Continuing the trend of interruptions, Seth Rollins cuts a great promo himself, apologizing for disrespecting Lesnar and explains to Heyman how he is trying to forge his own career, something in which Heyman should respect. Heyman does, and informs Rollins if he should ever have the Chutzpah to do it again, Lesnar might not be so forgiving. Rollins is smart on the mic, and eloquently countered Heyman’s verbal assault. Very impressive.

Awesome segment which concludes with Crazy Dean Ambrose taunting Rollins and The Authority with the Money in the Bank briefcase. “Come and get it.” Makes fun of Rollins, The Game, and Steph. Fantastic work.

Live on the WWE App, John Cena ran out and attacked Seth Rollins. Genius.

Nice start to RAW, and brilliant work by Dean Ambrose. This guy is massively over.

Backstage: Jamie Noble and Joey Mercury get more air time as Triple H orders them to go after Ambrose.

We’ve got ourselves a Triple Threat Intercontinental Championship Match. Cesaro wins a Battle Royal on SmackDown to qualify and Miz gets another rematch. This one was all in the hands of Dolph Ziggler as he went non-stop offensive. Very nice counter/reversal chain with the three all going for pin attempts. Certainly earned the “This is Awesome” chants by the live crowd. Ziggler retains after Cesaro KOs Miz and Ziggler blasts Cesaro to the floor with a superkick. Solid match.

Funny moment where Cesaro tries a sunset flip pin over Miz, but he holds the ropes until Ziggler grabs Cesaro by the legs and slingshots him, face-first into Miz’s crotch. Funny stuff.

Backstage: Miz and Sandow complain to Triple H, and he is laughing hard. Tells Miz if he ever barges in again “his Direct-to-DVD career is headed to the employment line.” Wow. Awesome.

For some reason Total Divas leaks onto RAW, and not because it’s that time of the month. Layla faces off with Rosa Mendes while Natalya and Tyson Kidd bicker at ringside. Mid-match Kidd puts on his headphones and ignores the match completely, much like everyone else. Layla appeared to have rip out Rosa’s hair extensions. Ouch. Layla wins following a terrible neckbreaker. I’m with Kidd on this one.

What made this HORRIBLE: Michael Cole called Rosa Mendes… Latina Heat.

Latina Heat. Do you follow where I am going with this? Well, for the young and misinformed, the late Eddie Guerrero, Hall of Famer, was originally called Latino Heat, something he coined on his own. This moniker stuck with him for years, until his tragic passing. I want to have a little chat with Cole and just wonder what in blazing blue hell he was thinking.

My rage is comparable to a thousand burning suns right now.

It’s Dean Ambrose time! I wish he has some classic comedy music. He comes out with a gym bag belonging to Seth Rollins and does the ol’ give away the clothes routine. Seth comes out with Joey Mercury and Jamie Noble who bring their security crew. Ambrose leaves the case for Rollins who opens it and gets a spray of green slime in the face. The look on Ambrose’s face was priceless. He’s got this sneering smile which cannot be replicated. Ambrose is perfect on all levels. His mic skills are top notch, and his facial expressions for the camera are dead-to-rights perfect.

Backstage: Randy Orton and Corporate Kane are ordered to take on John Cena and Dean Ambrose in a tag match. Orton and Kane complain about doing the dirty work again, but are interrupted by a buzzing sound. They all look at Stephanie who says her phone is not ringing. Cue the “vibrating noise” again, which she adamantly denies any knowledge of a vibrating item. Suddenly, Rollins grabs the MITB briefcase saying it’s his electric razor. Wow.

Tonight has been a load of comedy, and it’s been working. Something about tonight feels a bit less tense than in past weeks. It’s Dean Ambrose, it’s all his doing, and we thank him.

Although I am sure he had nothing to do with the shocking loss Mark Henry suffered tonight against Bo Dallas. I am not making this up. Dallas interrupted Henry’s apologetic promo and then handed him a clean loss. Color me shocked.

In another snoozefest, the Bella Family Feud drags on. This time, more name dropping of Daniel Bryan. Nikki brings out Eva Marie and Cameron who wind up jobbing to Brie, celebrating with a YES chant enjoyed by the live crowd. If this somehow turns into how Daniel Bryan returns, I am going to be pissed.

Friend of mine found this, WWE.com secretly hyping a return? Apparently when WWE.com has an error or just completely crashes, we see this:

bad news

It has been too long since my last mention of Wade “Bad News” Barrett. I still eagerly await his return. I miss him. I am sad. They could just put him on commentary.

Promo by The Dusts: They have the Cosmic Key. It isn’t science fiction anymore, it’s science fact! Yay Hooray!

The insanity continues as Slater Gator, the duo of Titus O’Neal and Heath Slater take on Los Matadores. Before the match, a lengthy video package featuring O’Neal and his family history of fighting against Breast Cancer and his involvement with the Susan G. Komen Foundaton. Very nice promo, real heartfelt. Back to the reality that is fiction, they bring out Hornswoggle in a Gator costume to combat the Bull. Crap. Adam Rose and The Bunny are on commentary, thankfully Bunny does not speak, but the rest of the Rosebuds are out there. Crap. Slater Gator wins after the midgets brawl, but Adam Rose and The Bunny attack. Bunny hits Slater with a big top rope splash. Crap. This is sad. Reverend Jesse Jackson was at ringside.

Mark Henry vs. Bo Dallas on Main Event. Henry pissed.

Apparently, The Bunny has his own superstar page on WWE.com. Please explain this.

Speaking of pissed, they have been hyping how Big Show delivered the KO Punch to Alexander Rusev on SmackDown. Big Show did defeat Rusev, but by DQ. Now Rusev responds and is ticked off. Lana spouts off her agenda, and is interrupted by Big Show who tears into the Russian power couple. Big Show shows a video package of his promise to Mark Henry to get revenge and the match on SmackDown where Rusev got himself DQ’d, and wound up eating the KO Punch, and boy did Rusev sell it like a champ. Rusev starts shouting in Russian, and Big Show shuts him up with a Big Lebowski reference about knocking back a “white Russian.” Big Show is freaking awesome I almost forgot. Lana and Rusev RUN. Big Show then yanks down the big Russian flag, prompting Rusev to attack, but is dumped from the ring with ease.

Great segment, sometimes I forget just how Big Show kills it on the mic. When he is in the mode, he delivers.

Dean Ambrose! John Cena has a backstage promo with Renee Young, and as Cena warns Ambrose not to get in the middle… He strolls right into the middle of the segment. AMBROSE IS AWESOME.

What? A third Divas match tonight!? AJ Lee and Paige? Couldn’t hear a damn thing Paige said because the CM Punk chants were deafening. Paige brings out AJ’s opponent and new best friend, Alicia Fox. Short match with AJ having some offense, but a distraction by Paige allows Fox to strike and pin AJ. Beatdown ensues. CM Punk chants have ceased.

Taped promo with Bray Wyatt, focusing on Luke Harper and how Bray is “setting him free” after he has finally “fixed him.” Wow, I got a chill from this one. Glad they went back to the working formula of creepy promos. Hope it helps the Wyatt Family gimmick as a whole. Been on a nosedive lately, would like to see some more beneficial airtime.

Miz is fuming at everything while Damien Sandow fights valiantly against United States Champion Sheamus. You know, last year I would have thought this would be an exciting match, but since Sandow is on the comedy row losing streak, I could not feel this one at all. Sheamus easily defeated the stunt double. I wonder if this is how WWE Creative will shift Miz over to challenge for the United States Championship while Cesaro will go after Dolph Ziggler and the Intercontinental Championship.

Well here we are, big stuff happening tonight as Hulk Hogan makes his way into the ring! Very exciting to see the Hulkster and Hulkamania still going strong after 30 years. He cuts an incredible promo regarding Breast Cancer Awareness Month and introduces a number of guests at ringside on behalf of the the Susan G. Komen Foundation, and pushes wearing the pink ribbon, as well as declaring all proceeds WWE Merchandise this month will go to support the Susan G. Komen Foundation. I got chills hearing the passion from Hogan. Damn awesome promo, damn awesome for the Hulkster to come out and cut a promo just for that.

Backstage: Randy Orton is whining again to Kane about how they are doing the dirty work. Kane complains about still wrestling and not doing his new job. Stephanie McMahon interrupts saying how Seth Rollins is part of the family and they should want to fight Ambrose and Cena after last week. Steph taunts them by teasing how “people are saying bad things… they’ve lost their edge.” Kane calls bull on that, says Stephanie is likely saying it to get a reaction from them. They don’t care and walk off.

Our main event is John Cena and Dean Ambrose facing Randy Orton and Kane. Crowd goes pure-wild as the charging motor/possible chainsaw theme hits, swiftly transforming to mixed reaction as John Cena enters. When the unhinged Ambrose hits the ring, the live crowd became unhinged themselves. Cena takes the obligatory beating until making the hot tag. Ambrose with outside splashes on both Orton and Kane, then hits the Rampage Lariat on Orton. He strikes with the Dirty Deeds, but Seth Rollins runs in to end the match in DQ. Cena starts beating on Rollins and the Ambrose gets into it. Cena throws Ambrose off, earning loud boos. Ambrose dumps Cena to the floor and the crowd erupts. Unfortunately, The Authority overpower both Ambrose and Cena, as Rollins then delivers Curb Stomps to both atop the MITB briefcase. After hitting Cena, the crowd breaks out into a loud “Thank You Rollins” chant.

The show was average at best, but it was Dean Ambrose and the Triple Threat Intercontinental Championship match which saved the show. There were a lot of comical moments, some which worked, some which fell flat, such as Jamie Noble and Joey Mercury asking The Great Khali were to find Dean Ambrose. Also, the promo between Seth Rollins and Paul Heyman was surprisingly well played. Main event was good, sucks about the DQ finish, but with the heels on top this week we are now wondering how Ambrose will top this week’s antics on RAW next week. Will Brock Lesnar make an appearance or will he and the WWE Championship remain absent until Hell in the Cell? Very reminiscent of the 80’s and early 90’s where the champion would rarely appear on television, and the championship itself only being defended at pay-per-views. I can get used to that.