Pop 5: Harry Potter Characters

daniel cohen gives us his “pop 5” Harry Potter characters … but bewareL this piece contains SPOILERS

Harry Potter — the boy who is worth more money than Bruce Wayne, Tony Stark, and Scrooge McDuck combined. Everyone knows who Harry Potter is. I’m as big a Harry fan as anyone. When the book series ended, I at least said, ‘We’ve still got the movies.’ But now Harry Potter truly is on the cusp of concluding once and for all. It’s been one hell of a ride.

To commemorate the event, I thought I’d share my Top 5 favorite Potter characters. There are so many damn names in this series, it wasn’t easy. So grab your goblets, fire up the firebolts, and accio the butter-beer. Here are my Top 5 favorite Potter characters:

(Beware: I will be spoiling the Potter series)

Honorable Mention: Ron Weasley
Poor Ron. Much like his little hissy-fit in Goblet of Fire, he will always be Harry’s side-kick. I wish there was room for him, but he just didn’t make the cut. Sorry, Ron.

5. Hermione Granger
I can’t imagine going to school with her. Hermione is the type of person who singlehandedly ruins the curve on a final exam. But to be fair, Harry and Ron would probably be dead without her. She’s even trusted with a time traveling device at thirteen years old. That’s some serious shit. As far as the movies go, I always felt Emma Watson over-acted, until Deathly Hallows Part I, where you really see just how much of a genius she truly is.

4. Voldemort
On the surface, Voldemort is just your run-of-the-mill power-hungry villain. But let’s really think about his accomplishments. The guy splits his soul into seven pieces, including one where he put his 16-year-old self into a journal. Whoa. Apparently he’s the only wizard who can flat-out fly without a broom or Thestral. Let’s not forget this crazy bastard also conjured up a giant snake made up of fire. Towards the end of the series, he did get a little sloppy. His signature Avada Kedavra curse failed … not once. Not twice. Not three times. Not four times. But five times! Dude, try something else. For as powerful as Voldemort was, he could never beat Harry Potter.

3. Dumbledore
Albus Percival Wulfric Brain Dumbledore … but you can call him Headmaster. Much like Voldemort, Dumbledore is your run-of-the-mill wise old mentor. But even with all his Obi-Wan Kenobi sage-like advice, Dumbledore is pretty damn powerful. I like when he traps Voldemort in a watery snow globe thing during their epic duel at the Ministry of Magic. But what fascinates me about Dumbledore is that he always knows what’s going on. Dumbledore certainly has some demons in his past, but if you are up to no good, chances are he’s going to know about it. Don’t mess with Albus.

2. Harry Potter
Harry endured challenges his rookie year at Hogwarts that would make other wizards his age shit their wizard robes. Now of course he had a lot of help, but Harry is without question a total badass. He conjured up the Expecto Patronum spell his third year at Hogwarts, a spell that most adult wizards can’t even perform. The grind Harry goes through year after year is comparable only to the Stanley Cup Playoffs. Dragons, Unforgivable Curses, Giant Basilisks, Dementors, Dark Wizards…there’s no question Harry has been to Hell and back. After finally defeating Voldemort, I’m sure he can’t go anywhere without other wizards and witches gawking at him. He’s the Tom Brady of the Wizazrding World.

1. Snape
Snape really is the most intriguing character in the series. He almost belongs in a James Bond movie, acting as a double agent for over 15 years. Snape is a pretty good character, but it’s not until you learn his back story at the very end of the series where you really understand just how complex he really is. The poor guy also had to deal with James Potter at school, and he was a total dick cheese. But it’s Harry who really sums up Snape perfectly in the epilogue when he calls him ‘the bravest man I ever knew.’ There’s a lot of death in the Potter series, but Snape’s was easily the most heroic as he literally cries out the last bit of information Harry needs after being strangled by a giant snake. Long live Severus.