The WWE-Ek: Ranting and Rumbling



Am I the only one who got ticked off when John Cena made the CM Punk-like threat of taking the WWE Championship and taking it home? Except, Cena opted to say he would be a champion who sits at home and show up whenever he feels like it. Okay, you can’t have a guy threaten, even if it is scripted, to win a championship, and then only show up to defend it three times a year, when THAT IS WHAT THE CURRENT CHAMPION DOES RIGHT GODDAMN NOW!!! Brock Lesnar has not defended the title in months. He did not even show up on television until recently. Also consider people probably would not mind if Cena sat home and did not show up for a while. Hell, considering what Brock has done (nothing), the WWE fans have survived without the WWE Championship on television. So this was a complete a total failure.

Rusev. United States Champion. Set to feud with Ryback, except WWE just wrote that one out and now put Dean Ambrose? Was that temporary? I get they want to keep Mr. Russia as someone who has not been pinned or has tapped out, however all these crappy count-out and DQ finishes are making him look weak. Have him pick up a pinfall victory over someone major, and then we can take him seriously again. Otherwise the only thing I want to see right now is a 360 rotation of Lana, and I don’t mean by a Cesaro Swing… Unless she’s into that sort of thing. I won’t judge.

It’s been a mostly uneventful week in WWE-land. Sure, Daniel Bryan made an in-ring return on SmackDown, however the promised singles match turned into a six-man tag, in which along with Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose picking up the win against Seth Rollins, Big Show, and Kane.

Speaking of Seth Rollins, he is being pushed to the moon, whether anyone realizes it or not. Being able to go promo-to-promo with Rabbi Paul Heyman is a feat few can do. The only others I could think of are CM Punk and… and… Damn it. No one else comes to mind. On Monday Night RAW, we saw Paul Heyman put Rollins over while still treating him as an adversary. Once again on SmackDown, we see Rollins using his own verbal ammunition to cut off the Rabbinical Advocate for Brock Lesnar. The segment ended with a tease of the future, with Rollins possibility of being a “Paul Heyman” guy.

This I could see. What I would love to see, although the chances of it are very slim, is Heyman putting together a stable of a “youngblooded” themed heel stable, consisting of Seth Rollins, Cesaro, Tyson Kidd, Wade Barrett, and even someone like Joe Hennig (Curtis Axel). Why? Heyman does not need to only manage people incapable of mic skills. Look at his time with CM Punk. The Second City Saint certainly did not need a mouthpiece, but having Heyman alongside only added to his individual stock and star power. Imagine what Heyman could do being in the corner of Dolph Ziggler or Seth Rollins? Hell, what about someone I did not mention before, like Luke Harper?

The focus now is on the Royal Rumble. Big question who could win this year. Daniel Bryan, Roman Reigns, Dean Ambrose, Sting, Dolph Ziggler, Zack Ryder… So many contenders. The big question is, who goes into WrestleMania as champion? I give big props to WWE right now, because as of this week, they just made Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar believable. Six months ago I could not have seen Lesnar against anyone “smaller” than him. Only a “John Cena” or “Randy Orton” could go one-on-one. Of course, there is the tease of Roman Reigns being being “big enough” to face off with Lesnar, although I don’t believe it. Get it?

Thank Primus Bad News Barrett retained the Intercontinental Championship against Sin Cara on SmackDown. If he lost… Tables would have been flipped.

This Monday night is some sort of legends reunion show, with Hulk Hogan, Shawn Michaels, Kevin Nash, Scott Hall, and Ric Flair appearing. For all we know it could be one two-minute segment concluding with Ron Simmons shouting “DAMN!” and that is it. Or, Sgt. Slaughter and Hacksaw Jim Duggan defeating Miz and Mizdow in a tag match.


Impact Wrestling

Business has picked up. Seems as though the new station has prompted a rejuvenation for Impact Wrestling. First off, the forming of the “Beat Down Clan” consisting of MVP, Samoa Joe, Low Ki, Eric Young, and NOT Bobby Lashley. They turn on him at the end of this week’s show, setting up a new stable feud with the BDC and Kurt Angle and whomever he recruits.

Saw a neat clip of Eric Young pinning Bobby Roode with a PILEDRIVER. I love Piledrivers. Thank Primus someone is still allowed to use them.

Awesome Kong is back. She is a killer. Would have liked to see more than three weeks of her in WWE, because I want to see those Divas crushed. However, in Impact, despite having enlarged breasts and other plastic parts, the women in Impact Wrestling can wrestle and not flop around like waterless fish.

That’s it. I’m done for this week.