Apollo Crews(c) vs Andrade for the United States Championship
Two performers that seem to get under-appreciated in a feud that seems to be overlooked. The rivalry that started a few injuries ago has recently served to highlight issues in Zelina Vega’s troubled stable as Angel Garza was unsuccessful in tipping the odds to Andrade’s favor thanks to the intervention of guest commentator, Kevin Owens. Once “El Idolo” had it well in hand, Apollo dips out of the hammerlock DDT and hits a Blue Thunder Bomb for the win.
Winner: Apollo Crews
Bayley & Sasha Banks(c) vs Alexa Bliss & Nikki Cross vs The IIconics for the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship
The ladies start off the main card tonight. Some of the combinations in the ring, especially when Sasha, Alexa, and Peyton (who continues to come into her own) are in there as the workhorses. Bayley’s character work is on display as she comes off very natural when mocking Billie Kay’s accent and some non-PG dialogue. When Alexa hits a Twisted Bliss on Peyton, it’s Sasha who capitalizes with a pinning combination on Little Miss Bliss. The Boss and Bayley “Dos Straps” retain.
Winners: Bayley & Sasha Banks
Sheamus vs Jeff Hardy
If you wanted to see the payoff to the angle you saw on Smackdown then urine luck! I promise not to do that again.
Jeff brings it fast and early with success as anger is friend. Sheamus manages to weather the storm, though. The big Irishman even takes a Twist of Fate and a Swnaton but gets his foot on the rope at the very last half-second. Frustrated, Jeff follows him outside and takes a run along the barricade… and right into a boot to the face. Another Brogue Kick inside the ring and vengeance is denied to The Charismatic Enigma.
Winner: Sheamus
Asuka(c) vs Nia Jax for the WWE Raw Women’s Championship
This may just be what’s needed to get Asuka back to where she was in 2017-2018. Nia has generated a lot of heat over the past few weeks and just how much is manufactured and how much is legitimate is a bit of a mystery but a mystery for another time.
Asuka has both hands full in this one, trying her best to catch a hold on Nia. Nia, meanwhile meets every attempt with a slam or by sending her skidding across the ring like skipping stone. It’s strikes that keep Asuka in it until she manages to pull Nia over the top rope with a flying armbar. Nia breaks the hold but Asuka latches on another. Not a great strategy because the ref keeps counting. Double count out and The Empress of Tomorrow retains. The “Tomorrow” part comes into play in that this is probably not over between them.
Winner: Double Count Out
Braun Strowman vs The Miz & John Morrison in a handicap match for the WWE Universal Championship
Earlier in the show, Kayla Braxton informed Miz & Morrison that the stipulations of the match did not allow for “co-champions” and that whoever scored a pinfall or submission in their match would be declared Universal Champion. They seemed surprised but undeterred.
With the match underway, Braun has to deal with quick tags and John Morrison’s elusive parkour abilities. Still, he stays in distinct control until successive diving dropkicks to the outside put him on the defensive. Morrison spams Disaster Kicks throughout and Miz gets a top rope stomp to assist him in a Skull-Crushing Finale. The championship stipulation ignites Miz’s triple threat instincts and he yanks Morrison off the cover! He’s surprised his own self! They scramble to get Morrison back on top but Braun bench presses him out of the ring. MC M.I.Z. gets mollywhopped and Johnny Drip Drip gets the powerslam.
Winner: Braun Strowman
Drew McIntyre(c ) vs Bobby Lashley for the WWE Championship
Styles make fights. We all love the big man/little man match and the Dusty/Flair dynamic. This was that classic fighter vs wrestler match. Headbutts and big slams versus joint locks and takedowns. The legitimate world class grappler and the guy who looks like you built a pro wrestler in a lab.
Bobby puts Drew in the full nelson before the bell even rings. Three referees can’t get him to release the hold but the fact that he can’t win the title if the match doesn’t start does. McIntyre is in survival mode early on. Even after pulling off a Northern Lights suplex, he recovers slower than Lashey. It isn’t until they get to the outside that things turn around. After slamming Lashley into the plexiglass and getting (almost disastrously) driven into the floor and ringpost, Big Mac gets his second wind. Even then, it’s 50/50 throughout. Drew nearly Tombstones McIntyre but a roll through anklelock stops him. Lashley goes for a spear but Drew catches him in a kimura lock. The spear comes when Drew telegraphs the Claymore.
And, of course, once Lashley is ahead, the Lana Drama starts. She comes down to the ring and starts yelling at the referee for supposedly favoring McIntyre. When Bobby goes to shoot off the ropes he has to stop short so as not to collide with her. This gives Drew an opening for a headbutt that sends Bobby into Lana and Lana into MVP. A follow up Claymore gets the win.
Afterwards, MVP is beside himself and both he and Lashley walk right past a dejected Lana sitting on the ringside floor.
Winner: Drew McIntyre
Street Profits and The Viking Raiders Interlude
This was the “cinematch” of the program. Over the past few weeks, we’ve seen the Street Profits and Viking Raiders compete in pickup basketball, golf, bowling, ax throwing … pretty much everything except a wrestling match. They get into it early in the parking lot despite no “street fight” stipulation being named. After busting the windshield of Braun Strowman’s Buick Grand National, they beat feet inside. In Ron Burgundy fashion, things escalate quickly. Street Profits decide to add golf clubs to the equation but Erik and Ivar respond with shields, an ax, and a bowling ball? They cool things off by laying down the weapons but Montez Ford gets his 7/10 spare picked up and D’Angelo Dawkins spears Ivar through a window. Both teams admit that it has gotten out of hand but a new player appears! Seven motorcycles box them in and former Cruiserweight champ, Akira Tozawa, sics his ninja minions on them. In dire straits, they combine forces as The Viking Profits to clear house. Once Tozowa calls in a 7ft+ Super Ninja (believed to be the PC’s Jordan Omogbehin) and they call it quits, climbing to the top of a semi-trailer. One last exchange lands them all in a dumpster and being admonished by a referee who thinks the Ivar is cute and Erik… not so much.
Winners: Fans of comedy wrestling
Randy Orton vs Edge in The Greatest Wrestling Match Ever
The name choice as a gimmick was a bad idea. The hubris that has become synonymous with WWE programming made wrestling fans groan and made critics salivate in anticipation of the (no pun intended) backlash. But this? This was a truly great match with nearly 45 minutes of action and drama that kept us watching in anticipation. At one point, commentary does bring up the Flair/Steamboat and it made me think of the sorts of matches that used to define main event wrestling: Verne Gagne and Nick Bockwinkel, Dusty Rhodes and Tully Blanchard, Bret Hart and whoever was in there with Bret Hart.
They put on some nice touches to start the match. The show’s theme of “The Greatest Show” covered by Panic at the Disco is played before the classic MSG mic rig is lowered from the ceiling and the disembodied voice of the late Howard Finkel introduces the competitiors. MSG mic. Even Referee Charles Robinson is in classic ref attire with bow tie and blue shirt.
This isn’t going to make any future “OMG moments” lists. I don’t know what criteria goes into how many stars. What is evident upon watching this match is that it is something special and it is true art by true artists. Sure, some (myself included) never bought into Edge being “The Guy.” Randy Orton is notorious for having never pushed himself near his potential. But is there any doubt that these two are anything but all-time great five tool players? They tell a story expertly and with real conviction and drama. Past injuries are targeted. Homages to some of both men’s great rivalries and friendships are sprinkled throughout. When Randy Orton releases the most devastating move in his arsenal to get his win back from Wrestlemania, you know that there will be a rubber match. The question is, what tops this?
Winner: Randy Orton
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