The Year was 2013. The NHL had a mini-lockout (boooooo), Edward Snowden leaked some sensitive United States information and gay marriage was legalized (yaaaay!) Disney drove every parent (and retail worker) crazy with their latest hit, an entire horror franchise was kickstarted and Matthew McConaughey stole the Oscar from his co-star in a completely different movie. The Marvel Cinematic Universe kicked off Phase 2 to middling reviews (wow, that’s eerie) and Miley Cyrus released one Banger(z) of an album. I watched 122 films for 2013 ranging from the best, to the worst, to the absolute mediocre. Here, I rank my personal Top 10, my least favorite and a few honorable mentions of the year. So, grab your creepy sheep mask, beat your chest and hum and if you don’t like it, “Let It Go!” This…is 2013! (Editor’s Note: Hey, were around back in 2013, too!)
Author’s Note: These are just my opinions. Friendly and respectable discourse is always welcome. Also, minor spoilers, of course.
Full List on Letterboxd
Song to Blast: “Wrecking Ball” by Miley Cyrus
- Frozen
Starring: Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel, Jonathan Groff, Josh Gad, Alan Tudyk, Ciaran Hinds
Directed by: Jennifer Lee and Chris Buck
Where to Watch: Disney+ (Sub), Most Rental Platforms
It’s crazy to think the Frozen phenomenon was only 10 years ago. Retail and theater workers probably look back on the time with a little bit of PTSD, something akin to the Tickle-Me-Elmo fiasco of the 1990s. That being said, Frozen earned its reputation with an incredible story of sisterhood and acceptance, an X-Men comic book in fairytale form. The film has a massive sense of scope and wonder. You feel warm watching Frozen, even surrounded by snow and ice. Elsa and Anna are complicated characters, both experiencing different ideals for how their lives should be going. That’s to say nothing of the music by Kristen Anderson-Lopez and Rob Lopez. “Let It Go” might have been every parent’s nightmare in 2013, but it encapsulates the whole film with its epic-ness. The film isn’t just a one-hit-wonder, however, as other songs such as “In Summer” and “Do You Want to Build a Snowman” build the story. A lot of comedy, a lot of heart, and a lot of scale make Frozen just as good in 2023 as it was a decade ago.
- About Time
Starring: Domhnall Gleeson, Rachel McAdams, Bill Nighy, Margot Robbie, Tom Hollander, Vanessa Kirby, Lydia Wilson, Lindsay Duncan, Richard E. Grant
Directed by: Richard Curtis
Where to Watch: Starz (Sub), Most Rental Platforms
This writer has been humbled. I looked at About Time sitting in my Watchlist for nearly a decade, putting it off as some lame romantic comedy. My friends and fellow film reviewers always implied I needed to check it out. “I’ll get to it one day,” I would say, annoyed that this type of film was still being made and that I was expected to somehow see something different in it.
How wrong I was.
About Time IS a romantic comedy, but not in the typical sense. There is the usual meet cute, the “I must get this girl before she disappears forever” mentality. What makes it so special, however, is the mix of other forms of comedy there. It can be a little bit crass and rude at points. It can make off the wall style jokes that may take you a moment to get. Most importantly, About Time makes you wonder how you would figure out the scenario’s Domhnall Gleeson’s Tim has to go through. Did I mention this is also a science fiction time travel flick? Tim can go back in time, much like his father (Bill Nighy), to change little things that happen and re-meet Mary (Rachel McAdams) several different times. This aspect seems whimsical at first but turns dark upon a moment’s notice, with Tim having to make tough decision after tough decision about his family and life. It’s wonderful and saccharine. Do not take 10 years to watch this like I did.
- The Conjuring
Starring: Vera Farmiga, Patrick Wilson, Lili Taylor, Ron Livingston, Joey King
Directed by: James Wan
Where to Watch: Max (Subs), Most Rental Platforms
It’s fair to say that the aptly-named Conjuring Universe has become one of the most well-known and biggest hits of the past decade, whether the films were good or not. Audiences love their mainstream horror flicks and they will constantly flock to the theaters in droves to see them—me included! While not so fresh anymore, in 2013, the release of The Conjuring was just what we were looking for. There is nothing new about a haunted house story. They are flicks we’ve seen about a million times before and will continue to a million times more. It’s the care that director James Wan takes with his films that make them stand the test of time and scare the ever-loving crap out of the viewer.
Based on the famous paranormal investigators, Ed and Lorraine Warren, The Conjuring is the typical Hollywoodization of real life events (and I use that term loosely). But it feels fresh, as Wan uses practical effects to craft his scares the proper way to scare the audience. Yes, there are jump scares (most great horror films have them), but when used the properly, scaring you with what ACTUALLY needs to scare you instead of random Joe Blow popping out from the darkness. Scenes such as the Hide and Clap game and the woman on the dresser have stuck in the cultural zeitgeist for this long for a reason. Say what you want about the rest of the franchise, but this flick is scary and one of the best of its kind.
- Her
Starring: Joaquin Phoenix, Scarlett Johansson, Amy Adams, Rooney Mara, Chris Pratt, Olivia Wilde, Brian Cox, Kristen Wiig, Bill Hader
Directed by: Spike Jonze
Where to Watch: Max (Subs), Most Rental Platforms
Her has to be the most underrated movie on this list. A sad and strange look at a damaged man after his divorce, Joaquin Phoenix’s Theodore takes solace in an A.I. virtual assistant voiced by Scarlett Johansson. What could be construed as a poor premise hits you right in the heart, as Theodore begins to fall in love with the A.I. — much to the confusion of his family and friends. Phoenix is a master in his subtlety, pulling you in to watch as his mind breaks each and every second. Johansson brings an electricity to her role, making the viewer also fall in love with this virtual entity. I’d like to say we would all share in the general public’s disgust and wariness of Theodore, but who is to say we couldn’t also find ourselves in a situation like this.
The dangers of A.I. have been prevalent in film for decades, from 2001: A Space Odyssey to The Terminator, with varying ideologies coming from them. Her, in my opinion, joins the ranks of great science fiction films that toys with the dangers of the subject, something that we’re seeing today with movie studios wanting A.I. to write their scripts instead of actual writers. Have you not learned your lesson from your own movies, HOLLYWOOD?!
- Dallas Buyers Club
Starring: Matthew McConaughey, Jared Leto, Jennifer Garner, Dallas Roberts, Steve Zahn, Denis O’Hare, Griffin Dunne
Directed by: Jean-Marc Vallée
Where to Watch: Starz (Sub), Most Rental Platforms
Not to get too dark (but then again, we’re talking about Dallas Buyers Club), but we’ve officially entered one of the greatest films about a worldwide epidemic in the AIDS crisis. McConaughey plays Ron Woodroof, a straight cowboy (and he stresses that A LOT) diagnosed with AIDS during the 1980s. Once his friends and family find out, he becomes persona non grata. To combat this, he begins to smuggle unapproved drugs and start a battle with the FDA. The film is dour, the subject matter tells us as much, but is carried by wonderful direction from Vallée, amazing cinematography and an all-timer performance from everyone’s favorite Joker (I jest), Jared Leto, who portrays a trans woman named Rayon. The world was not kind to the gay community of the time, with prejudice and homophobia running wild, as Ron has to navigate his new partnership with people he feels lesser than him. It’s a tough film, but a fair and great one, though I will be controversial and say McConaughey shouldn’t have won the Best Actor Oscar that year (for more, see later down the list).
- You’re Next
Starring: Sharni Vinson, Nicholas Tucci, Wendy Glenn, AJ Bowen, Barbara Crampton, Ti West
Directed by: Adam Wingard
Where to Watch: Max (Sub), Most Rental Platforms
Author’s Note: You’re Next is not a 2011 film. Just because it played at one festival that 9 people attended does not mean it was released that year. /End Rant, as the reddit kids say. Anyway, I’m always excited to talk horror, and You’re Next is one of the absolute best. A brutal and unforgiving home invasion, You’re Next doesn’t seem to reinvent the wheel too much…until it does. A lot of twists and turns (that I won’t spoil, because they need to be seen) mixed with unbelievable kills and some fantastic acting from the most niche of actors creates the perfect little horror flick. A badass lead (played by Sharni Vinson), some creepy masks and a killer opening song by Dwight Twilley are just the cherry on top of this violent sundae.
- Prisoners
Starring: Jake Gyllenhaal, Hugh Jackman, Maria Bello, Terrence Howard, Paul Dano, Viola Davis, Melissa Leo, David Dastmalchian, Dylan Minnette
Directed by: Denis Villeneuve
Where to Watch: Netflix (Sub), Most Rental Platforms
A lot of people ask for recommendations of Thanksgiving films from me around November. The usual answer is the easily digestible (no pun intended) Planes, Trains and Automobiles. Most recently, I think the fun and gorey Thanksgiving may be placed in there as well. However, to me, Prisoners is the ultimate Thanksgiving movie, even if it is a hard pill to swallow. When two couples meet for a holiday dinner, they discover their daughters are missing. Through a series of events and a police investigation, the whereabouts of said children begin to unravel. Prisoners is dark. It’s deep. It will make you question your sanity, much like Hugh Jackman’s character does throughout the film.
These aspects are put together well by Villeneuve’s excellent direction, Roger Deakins’s phenomenal cinematography and some wonderful editing by Joel Cox and Gary D. Roach (when do you ever see me credit editors?!) Prisoners is gripping, making the viewer tense up even when they don’t have kids (which I do not). The best aspect is the shades of grey the characters portray. The heroes aren’t truly good people, they’re just the lesser of evils in a certain situation. Jackman especially scares the crap out of you, because he’s supposed to be the sympathetic one, though he is wildly flying off the handle at the drop of a hat. To me, this is Villeneuve’s best film to date and needs to be viewed as soon as possible.
- 12 Years a Slave
Starring: Chiwetel Ejiofor, Lupita Nyong’o, Michael Fassbender, Benedict Cumberbatch, Brad Pitt, Paul Giamatti, Paul Dano, Sarah Paulson, Alfre Woodard, Scoot McNairy, Michael Kenneth Williams, Garrett Dillahunt, Taran Killam, Storm Reid
Directed by: Steve McQueen
Where to Watch: Most Rental Platforms
This one isn’t going to be fun to talk about. Obviously 12 Years a Slave is a phenomenal film, hence its ranking on this list, but JESUS, it is a hard watch (as it should be.) Based on a true story, it’s a deep look into a free man’s capture and entrapment back into slavery and boy oh boy, does it make you hate this country’s foundings with each and every frame. It is amazing and scary at how barbaric people can be, and not all that long ago to boot. Director Steve McQueen is a revelation, as he takes his time with each and every shot, some that go on so long, you’re wondering what horrors are to come next. 12 Years a Slave is brutally real, unforgiving and relentless because of the writing and performances. While Ejiofor is our protagonist, it’s Lupita Nyong’o who steals every scene she is in, earning her Best Supporting Actress Oscar the moment she stepped on screen. Slave isn’t a fun movie, but it is something that should be watched and, in my opinion, taught in modern history and film classes.
- Before Midnight
Starring: Ethan Hawke, Julie Delpy
Directed by: Richard Linklater
Where to Watch: Max (Sub), Most Rental Platforms
I find it a little odd that the first time I get to talk about Richard Linklater’s Before series is with the third (and as of this writing) final film in the trilogy. A bit of a spoiler, but you WILL be seeing the other two in the next two years on these lists, but for now, Before Midnight! My favorite aspect of these films are how we spend 90-120 minutes with characters Jesse (Hawke) and Celine (Delpy), as they navigate their lives, whether it be their first meeting in Before Sunrise to the life they have together 20 years later. The conflict is completely internal, with two people just figuring each other out. It’s almost like we can put ourselves in their shoes, remembering how it is to navigate love for the first time to an everyday scenario. I’ve been told these flicks are just two hours of talking. Yes, they are, but you hang on every word, developing a love and longing for how important it is to love. Before Midnight might be the final stop in Jesse and Celine’s journey (and I myself have not gotten to where they are in my own life,) but the journey they have in this self-contained story makes the heart swell, the brain think and the skin crawl in anticipation for what we may never know comes next.
- The Wolf of Wall Street
Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Margot Robbie, Jonah Hill, Kyle Chandler, Matthew McConaughey, Jon Bernthal, Cristin Miliotti, Jon Favreau, Jean Dujardin, Rob Reiner, Ethan Suplee, Kenneth Choi, Joanna Lumley
Directed by: Martin Scorsese
Where to Watch: Netflix (Sub), Paramount+ (Sub), Most Rental Platforms
And finally, the main event, the creme de la creme, the champion of 2013, the film everyone remembers: The Wolf of Wall Street. Has there ever been an Oscar contender like this that resonates with young audiences the way this film has? Every single thing works here; from the high energy performances to Scorsese’s frenetic directing, to the wild and coked up editing. At an lofty 180-minute run time, Wall Street flies by, requiring an immediate rewatch to see if you missed anything the first time. So, why does this film initiate such love from cinephiles? Some people will tell you every man wants to be Jordan Belfort (I assure, we don’t).
Some will say we’re all hypocrites and we do resonate with the rich and want to be them (closer). I say, and this answer might surprise you, Martin Scorsese just made a really fucking good movie. Wall Street is funny, idiotic, sad and sexy, with all-timer performances from DiCaprio, Hill and at-the-time newcomer, Margot Robbie (for many reasons, by the way). This film is insanely quotable, keeps you guessing the whole time (even if you know the story,) and has one of the best drugged out scenes of all time consisting of a pay phone and some quaaludes. I don’t know what else to say, as The Wolf of Wall Street is a perfect movie, a personal favorite of Scorsese’s filmography and the biggest robbery in the Best Actor category at the Oscars ever. IT WAS YOUR YEAR, LEO! And yes, I will be back for 1984, 1994, 2004 and 2014 next year because…”THE SHOW GOES ON! I’M NOT F-ING LEAVING!”
Honorable Mentions
42, Evil Dead, Don Jon, Batman: The Dark Knight Returns, The Way Way Back, Stoker, Fruitvale Station
Documentary Spotlight
Big Shot, about the fraudulent owner of the NHL’s New York Islanders.
Crystal Lake Memories, a 10+-hour epic on the entire Friday the 13th film series.
I Know That Voice, a look into our favorite voice actors of animated movies, television and video games.
Sound City, a retrospective on one of the greatest recording studios of all time, featuring some of the greatest bands of all time (and national hero, Dave Grohl).
Not Listed
Begin Again (Released Wide 2014)
Enemy (Released Wide 2014)
Oculus (Released Wide 2014)
Snowpiercer (Released Wide 2014)
Worst Film of Year: Movie 43
Starring: Way Too Many Talented People for This Crap Movie
Directed by: Like, 12 People Who Don’t Deserve Credit
Where to Watch: On a Sinking Ship, Because You’ll Wanna Drown Shortly After Viewin
If my review weren’t summed up in the description above, let me just say that Movie 43 is WRONG. It was wrong from the moment the pen was put to paper (I like to think the writers scribbled this script on a cocktail napkin while drunk at a bar somewhere.) The idea of a bunch of A-List actors in a series of comedy skits sounds good on paper (or napkin), but it’s the execution that falls so horribly short. There is nothing, and I mean NOTHING funny here. You want parents who bully and try to make out with their kid? You got it. You want sex with poop? You got it. You want a bunch of middle schoolers scared of a tampon? Doesn’t that just spark fits of laughter? My sides hurt just thinking about laughing so hard. Or maybe that’s the heartburn from talking about this. I’m not sure. I need to lie down…
Honorable Mentions
Foodfight!, Grown Ups 2, Scary Movie 5, Carrie, OldBoy, A Haunted House, The Haunting in Connecticut 2: Ghosts of Georgia
