Last month, I started naming the best and worst of soaps in 2024. I praised Sharon Case’s ability to make questionable stories work. I criticized GH’s bizarre desire to coddle a homophobe. I have even more things to bitch about and applaud from this wonky year.
Worst Recast: Rebecca Budig as Taylor, B&B
I don’t find fault with Rebecca Budig’s performances. She is a good actress. She is really trying to make this casting work. She just isn’t Taylor. She just feels like some lady with Taylor’s name wandering around Los Angeles who Steffy calls mom for shits and giggles.
It is unfortunate when good actors get miscast. It happened to Maura West when she played Diane Jenkins on Y&R. Even Maura’s biggest fans will admit she shouldn’t have been playing that role. It isn’t the actor’s fault though. They took a job. The Powers That Be are the ones who fucked up.
Aside from being miscast, the other factor that makes Rebecca as Taylor awkward is they had a great recast. Krista Allen surpassed everyone’s wildest expectations when she played Taylor. Fans took to her fast and she became one of the most popular actors on B&B. The show rewarded Krista for this by treating her like shit and unceremoniously firing her. Fans didn’t just forget how good Krista was as Taylor. It is like going from name brand soda to a knockoff brand. Rebecca’s Taylor is the Dr. Thunder of Taylor’s.
The Chandler Massey Award For Phoning It In: Maurice Benard, GH
Maurice Benard is considered the face of GH. This has been the case for many years. Has that stopped Mo from thinking about pizza in multiple episodes this year? No. You can turn on an episode and you are likely to see him mentally wondering if he wants mushrooms or pepperoni on his pizza as Natalia blathers on.
I will say Sonny and Nina broke up this year, and I don’t recall him ever phoning it in with Cynthia Watros. Going from an actress you have great chemistry with to an actress you have elevator fart chemistry in Eva LaRue isn’t ideal. It also doesn’t help that Natalia is a bigot and Sonny is still interested in her because this show salivates over terrible pairings.
None of this excuses Mo phoning it in. I’ve always hated Sonny and I’m not a big fan of Mo, but I know he’s capable of better. If he’s going to be treated like the king of GH, the least he can do is be awake in scenes.
Biggest Hypocrites: Phyllis on Y&R and Steffy on B&B
I can’t stand to watch Phyllis shriek all over Genoa City about Sharon being a murderer. Phyllis has a body count and she doesn’t have the excuse of being high on PCP for any of it. I know Sharon and the other characters don’t know about the people Phyllis has killed, like Sasha and Tim, but they know about her running over Paul and Christine. That could be thrown in her face when she’s being a harpy.
Steffy is also a big hypocrite. She’s called Hope a slut multiple times with zero self-awareness. Fans know about Steffy’s sordid history. The other characters know about Steffy’s behavior. Why isn’t Hope allowed to clap back at her? If someone was calling me a slut and that person’s former father-in-law knows what her sugar walls feel like, I’d say something. Everyone on B&B is a slut except Finn.
Actress Most Likely To Win a Daytime Emmy: Susan Seaforth Hayes, Days
I do think Susan Seaforth Hayes is likely to win a Daytime Emmy for her work in the story of Doug dying. It was heartbreaking, but also beautiful to watch. You could feel the love Susan had for her late husband Bill and that Julie had for Doug. It was a wise choice to let Susan take the lead on this tribute.
The only debate is which category should Susan submit in it. The last time she was nominated in the Lead Actress category Jimmy Carter was president. I think she should just risk it and submit as Lead Actress. She’ll likely be up against Sharon Case and Nancy Lee Grahn, but I think she’d have a good chance. Supporting Actress is a very competitive category anyway. It might be best to stay out of that elbow fight.
The Brooke Logan Award For Achievement In Sluttery: Drew, GH
Drew banged a mother and daughter in the same year and one of them is his nephew’s wife. That is such gutter slut behavior. Drew doesn’t view banging Willow in his daughter’s room in front of a nanny cam as shameful behavior. He seems to think they are a great love story! It is a common problem for men to confuse validation and the thrill of sex they shouldn’t be having with love.
Most Boring Affair: Adam and Chelsea, Y&R
Adam and Chelsea boning should have been soap gold. You had parents struggling with their child’s OCD to the point he had to go to a facility. Everyone involved could act. It could have been a great story of a former couple fighting renewed feelings and giving in a few times. What we got was an incredibly limp cheating story. It is maddening to make cheating boring.
Y&R has had many great affairs like Jack and Diane in the ’80s and Nick and Phyllis in the 2000s. It is embarrassing for them to flop at infidelity. Then again, Josh Griffith is the same writer who had Mariah cheating on Tessa in a two week story. I don’t think any other Y&R head writer has managed this “feat.”
Best Dragging: Molly Drags Kristina At The Grave Site, GH
I am so proud of Kristen Vaganos. She came in last year after previous attempts to recast Molly flopped and has made Molly her own. Her work as Molly eviscerated Kristina for her plan to steal Irene is Daytime Emmy worthy. She needs to submit that episode for Outstanding Supporting Actress and I want her to win. She deserves it.
Weirdest Writing Choice on B&B: Carter Blowing Up His Life
Why would Carter ruin his life over a two month relationship with Hope? We all know this takeover of Forrester Creations will end in him being humiliated and Hope will end up back with Liam or with a Thomas recast. I’d be shocked if Hope and Carter were still together come spring. Where does the character go after this? Carter doesn’t have any family. His friendship with Ridge is done. He doesn’t have any relationship prospects when the inevitable breakup happens. Unless Brad has a plan, this story puts Carter in a worse position than he was before it happened.
Worst Retcon: Sasha Is Robert and Holly’s Daughter, GH
Even if you put aside the retcon not lining up with GH’s history at all, it is still dumb. Sasha has been on the show since 2018! She isn’t a new character. We’ve seen her get married, be a crackhead, lose a baby, lose a husband and get the Britney Spears treatment from her mother-in-law. It is random as hell to suddenly announce Holly had another secret baby and that it was Sasha.
Robert and Holly aren’t even on the canvas which makes this decision even more baffling. Sasha gets established characters as parents and they just bounce to have elderly sex in parts unknown. I understand that they felt the need to give Sasha more relevance after banishing her to the Quartermaine kitchen, but I think her being pregnant with Michael’s baby was enough.
This is very typical of co-head writer Chris Van Etten. His story ideas seem to always either be babies or paternity stories. It has gotten out of control to the point that it is likely Gio will be Dante and Brook Lynn’s retcon child. Can you think of anything else, Chris?! Jesus TikTok dancing Christ.
Weirdest Writing Choice On Days: Scrapping The Abigail Resurrection Story For An Imposter Story
AnnaLynne McCord is good as Cat, but they should have just had her play Abigail. I understand she only signed a one year contract at first so that might have spooked them from having her play a big recast. However, this show has managed to keep Jackée Harry for years. They should have just taken the risk. AnnaLynne has great chemistry with Billy Flynn so it was a missed opportunity.
The other aspect of this story that pisses me off is Clyde didn’t die and he’s just in a coma. I will never understand why this show thinks he’s such a great villain. He isn’t Stefano or Orpheus. He’s a yokel who raped his stepdaughter and killed Abigail. And knowing this show, he’ll be out of the coma soon enough so they can pretend he’s such a great villain again.
Best Fan Complaint: GH Fans Uniting To Get Rid Of Heather
GH fans are assholes. Literally any statement can start a fight. You could compliment an actress’s hair and it could end in a stan war. Yet when GH made the moronic choice to blame a dodgy hip replacement for Heather’s murders, we formed together like Voltron to complain about it. Even if you agreed with another fan on nothing else, you could agree that Heather had been crazy for decades and trying to reform her was idiotic. This resulted in Heather being written off to go be with Steven Lars. A win is a win.
Best New Old Set: The Newman Ranch, Y&R
It was a bad choice on Jill Farren Phelps’ part to have Sharon burn down the Newman Ranch in 2012. She had just gotten the job and literally her first choice was destroying an iconic set. After that, the Newman Ranch set became a rinky dink room in a mansion like you’d see on Days. Nothing special at all. Twelve years later, Y&R has restored the Newman Ranch, and it looks great.
I know Y&R is having budget problems so they should just have every Newman live at the ranch. Soap fans are already trained to expect all the rich people to live together in a mansion. It saves money for the show if you have multiple characters living on one set and you get conflict from family members who hate each other having to share the same space.
Character Who Most Needs To Move To Europe: Kristina, GH
To say that Kristina has been unlikable in 2024 would be an understatement. I know soap characters need to be unlikable sometimes, but when fans want a character to fall out of a window again, it might be time to send her away. Kristina begged to be Molly and TJ’s surrogate and then plotted to steal the baby. She has taken zero responsibility for that and for her decisions that led to baby Irene’s death. She can’t even acknowledge that Irene is the baby’s name or that TJ was her father. Kristina acts like she’s an animal that can reproduce asexually, like a starfish.
Kristina being an unlikable loon would be more acceptable if she were getting dragged more or being put in a padded room where she belongs. Molly dragging her was great, but we didn’t get enough of that. We’ve gotten a lot of Sonny and Alexis enabling her delusions and bad behavior. Sonny even encourages it and her need for revenge. It is tedious to watch.
Soap With The Most Fucked Up Morals: General Hospital
Why is Sonny the go-to character for parent and relationship advice? The man killed an FBI agent in cold blood four months ago. He almost accidentally blew up his daughter. One son did get blown up. The other son spent a year in a coma after getting shot standing next to him and after that was raped in prison because of Sonny’s choices. He shot his oldest son pointblank in the chest. Sonny is not a Tom Horton type character that doles out wisdom.
Even if you put aside Sonny’s criminal behavior, the way he conducts himself in relationships also isn’t great. He’s been married to Carly multiple times. He’s cheated and been emotionally abusive. What about this qualifies him to take on the role of wise old man? If I were looking for family or relationship advice, I wouldn’t go to a man with a history of toxic relationships who knows what the brain matter of an FBI agent looks like. Just a thought!
Dispatches From Soap Land
*I didn’t mind that GH skipped Thanksgiving this year. They have a lot going on with Lulu’s return and character deaths. I didn’t need to see the Quartermaines eating pizza again.
*Does Forrester Creations have an HR department? Because they really need one. B&B characters are banging in offices, getting called a slut by your boss and getting fired for fake nudes.
*Victoria on Y&R needs a story. You’d think having a long lost daughter arrive would have benefitted her, but it hasn’t since they write Claire like Mary Sunshine. I’d take Reed returning with a drug problem or even a business story at this point.
