I want to put this first, even though this took place later in the show. A very touching tribute to Sabu, who passed away over the weekend. Taz, tearfully spoke well, memorializing his longtime friend and expressed how meaningful his contributions were to professional wrestling and spoke about him on a very personal level. He did the Sabu sky gesture, to which the announce team and the fans in attendance followed suit.
Now, let’s get onto AEW Dynamite Beach Break 2025.
“Cooked.”
I am seeing this word all over social media, used in both positive and negative contexts. At this point, I don’t think anyone really knows how to use this term anymore. I cooked some eggs, or my meat has been cooked. I cook things. I’m a cook in a kitchen. Go cook yourself.
Beach Break 2025 was cooking cookies from the get-go. Kicking off with Will Ospreay never fails to ignite a crowd. His theme song hits, and boom the crowd goes wild. Next out is “Hangman” Adam Page. They defeated opponents Josh Alexander and the Never Openweight Champion, Konoske Takeshita. Fantastic opening contest. Alexander and Takeshita may seem like a random pairing within a stable, but when the match turns to their advantage, these guys are cooking with gas. Hangman and Ospreay had some tense close calls, testing their ability to trust each other. One spot saw Ospreay nearly wipe out Page with the Hidden Blade. Cooking with fire. Ospreay and Page got the win after a “Hidden Buckshot” or a “Buckshot Blade.”
After the match, it seemed their mutual respect began to break down in anticipation of their match at Double or Nothing. Let’s be honest, this feels like a future AEW World Championship match. Let me rephrase, this match IS the AEW World Championship match at Double or Nothing.
I’ll stop with “cook” now. I can’t stand it anymore. Did you really think I would use it throughout the whole column? Your brains must be cooked.
Ricochet defeated Zack Gowen
I guess Gowen doesn’t keep a spare prosthetic around? He came to the ring on crutches while Ricochet gloated about his “trophy.” This turned out to be surprisingly better than expected. I honestly didn’t follow Gowen’s career after WWE so I assumed based on his performance he kept in shape and in wrestling condition. Not a bad match, and it could have gone either way. Why either way? Well, Ricochet has become the ultimate troll, so a loss would let the fans cook him with laughter and he would still live to troll another day. But Ricochet got the win, because it had to be believable. Unless there was interference or some sort of disturbance, Gowen couldn’t believably win.
Ricochet taunting Gowen’s family and the crowd throughout the segment was pretty funny. Stuff like this will continue to make people hate Ricochet, go online and assume AEW is ruining him, when yet, it appears this is EXACTLY what Ricochet wants.
It’s amazing how easily individuals can be manipulated.
The Hurt Syndicate defeated Top Flight
Prior to the match, MVP demands MJF meet them in the ring, and it sounds a bit tense.
Not sure if this was a title bout, but it didn’t matter. Top Flight got their razzle dazzle in before being mauled like beef by lions. After the match, MVP gloats about the lack of competition, so out comes ROH Tag Team Champions, The Sons of Texas, Dustin Rhodes and Sammy Guevara. Dustin shows respect to MVP and his charges, but also throws a challenge of his own. However, CRU (Action Andretti and Lio Rush) interfere with a disturbingly weird promo about everyone being old and they should be champs and cooking cook cook. The segment began to jump the shark when thankfully MVP probably cut a bona fide shoot when he said the producer gave him a 30-second warning to wrap this up. In short, on Collision CRU will face the Sons of Texas and the winners get a shot at the championships held by The Hurt Syndicate at Double or Nothing.
If it’s CRU I’ll CRY.
Had this been left to Rhodes/Guevara and the Hurt Syndicate, it would be short, to the point, and match made. The addition of a directionless awkward pairing of two young wrestlers still struggling to find their niche was not helpful.
The Hurt Syndicate called out MJF who was found to be cowering behind Jerry Lynn but ratted out by Tony Khan in the Gorilla Position. He is brought to the ring where for one final time is given a chance. I guess hurting Top Flight was enough proof, as MJF wins a three-thumbs-up approval rating. However, his official signing will take place next week.
MJF reverting to a fearful child with his hand caught in the candy jar was pretty funny, even if it felt over the top. This is who he is and what he does. Lashley, despite the thumbs up, still isn’t playing around. They really do work well together, but with this being dragged out for another week, I can’t help but think something is going to go awry.
MJF saying he needed his lawyer, “Smart” Mark Sterling was pretty funny.
Mina Shirakawa pins Toni Storm in a 4-way with AZM and Skye Blue to earn a title shot at Double or Nothing
Fantastic match. This week’s Eliminator 4-way beat last week’s. AZM and Shirakawa are obviously no strangers, considering AZM pinned her a week ago to win the NJPW Strong Women’s Championship. Skye Blue is back and even with some ring rust, carried herself extremely well. Storm’s antics during the match are always fun. Her interactions with Shirakawa, both in comedy and with double-teams came off splendidly. Four-way bouts can often get chaotic and difficult to maintain a solid pace, but they pulled it off, producing a smooth match.
More drama unfolds afterwards, AZM is attacked by Mercedes Mone, still seething from her title loss, but Jamie Hayter rushes out and attacks Mone. This continues to add fuel to the feud between the Owen Hart finalists.
Storm didn’t have to be pinned, but taking the pin quickly elevates the intrigue. Shirakawa gets a title match, and by pinning Storm here, she could believably pin her come PPV.
A post-match video surfaced with Storm hyping the match. Hysterical. Storm’s gimmick must never end. Ever.
Nigel McGuiness in the ring, apologizing to Tony Schiavone and Daniel Garcia for his involvement. Garcia tells him to save it and to fight if he still has it in him. FTR and Stokely interrupt, ultimately goading Nigel and Garcia into accepting a challenge for a match. Stokely viciously drops Nigel’s battle with a medical disease. Woof. Ouchie.
Nigel in the ring again? Yes please.
Jon Moxely retains the AEW World Championship against Samoa Joe in a Steel Cage Match
Hot take: Didn’t like it. What I did like was the commentary team saying what we have all been saying since this began. If you are the World Champion, then you wear the belt, or opt to carry the belt, but regardless of how, you BRING THE CHAMPIONSHIP to the ring and you display it as the champion. This whole “belt is hostage” thing MUST END. I’m tired of it. I’m not going to be unbiased anymore. The Death Riders angle MUST END. I don’t understand how Tony Khan and others involved in creative see this as a good thing. Even longtime AEW die-hards are turning this off.
Was the match good? I can admit it was good that it delivered what was anticipated. Joe and Mox beating the piss out of each other. But even though it might be considered a good cage match, I wasn’t a fan.
We know what will happen. The “really BIG payoff” is when Mox finally loses, and OH MY GOD tHeReS tHe cHaMpIoNsHiP! Jon Cruz could win the championship and we’d love it. He could defend against his lifetime nemesis Serpentico! Mox bloody in a cage? Golly gee no one saw that coming either.
PAC is out with injury, so while the rest of the Death Riders fight off Willow Nightingale and Powerhouse Hobbs, a fellow in a hoodie rushes the ring and assists Mox with defeating Samoa Joe. Who was it? Gabe Kidd.
Now they have my attention. The Young Bucks and Okada come out as well. But wait! A wild Swerve Strickland appears and here comes the overbooked closing segment, but it does have a purpose. Swerve challenges the Death Riders and The Elite to an Anarchy in the Arena match for Double or Nothing.
I’m not sure of the numbers here, and it seems as though Willow and Shafir might get involved, but it seems Swerve needs another man to gain the advantage. If Shibata and Hook are still written off with injury, then it’s up to the one man whom I have been saying all along will be the Savior of AEW… The man who was injured by Gabe Kidd… The man who has teamed with and gone to war with Moxley…
… It’s EDDIE F’N KINGSTON.
Mark my words.
