Written by Brandon Hoffman
It’s Wednesday. You know what that means. AEW Dynamite received a stacked card tonight, live from the Addition Financial Arena in Orlando, Florida. We start off with a promo from AEW’s World Champion.
MJF Speaks, Brody King interrupts
Brody wanted to challenge for MJF’s World Title tonight, but MJF said no. MJF brought up a good point with Brody only beating enhancement guys over the past few weeks, therefore Brody needs to beat elite-level talent to earn this match. Then MJF got scared by Brody barking at him. To be fair though, if a 6’5’’ dog started barking at you, you’d also channel MJF’s scared energy.
Max versus Brody sounds like a great match coming up in the future. Bandido gave MJF a huge challenge with that babyface fire from last week’s show, and Brody could follow up with some hoss-styled power. If only it could be more believable that Brody has a chance to be World Champion here. MJF might just cheat again to win, but it’s going to be an awesome match regardless.
The Trios Champions (Mike Bailey, Kevin Knight, and Hangman Page) have a new trios name. The “Jet Set Rodeo” makes total sense. Although, Mike Bailey suggested “HORSE COCK!” which popped the crowd heavy. Hangman did not seem too enthusiastic about that name though, sadly. He said he tried it before and it didn’t work.
Samoa Joe v. “Speedball” Mike Bailey
Joe still has the ability to make his chops sound like gunshots, somehow. Those chops along with Speedball’s knees had the crowd cringing and cheering at every turn. Hook and Shibata came out to ringside halfway through the match and would distract Speedball multiple times. Meanwhile, there was a “Let’s Go Horse Cock” chant. Now that’s a comeback phrase the crowd can get behind.
After attacking the leg and Shibata’s flurries of offense on the outside, Joe finished this one via Muscle Buster. The match was great with Speedball getting lots of offense and Joe remaining a threat, but there was one glaring problem throughout this whole match. The established Samoa Joe we all know is a badass needing help to overcome Bailey is quite ridiculous. Joe should not need lackeys to do his dirty work to Bailey, but nowadays he cannot win without help from The Opps.
Death Riders (Jon Moxley, Daniel Garcia, & Wheeler YUTA) v. Don Callis Family (Lance Archer, Hechicero, & Rocky Romero) – 6-Man Tag Street Fight
The brawling started immediately. There were chokeslams through tables, dropkicks into trash cans, and Marina with the armbar on Lance Archer. Death Riders were positioned as the faces here, making Moxley the most resilient one. That resiliency was especially the case after Moxley took a chokeslam into a sheet of broken glass, thumbtacks shaped in a skull, and barbed wire. That blood seeping down Moxley’s back looked nasty as hell.
Daniel Garcia and Moxley would Sharpshooter and Stomp Rocky Romero respectively to put him to sleep for the Death Riders win. It was a balls-to-the-wall brawl with plenty of spots to tick the violence-lovers in the audience. Moxley falling into this dangerous plunder on a random Wednesday continues to add onto his “ace of the company” image. He truly is willing to do anything to make the Don Callis Family, more specifically Lance Archer, that more threatening. How commendable.
The Sisters of Sin (Thekla, Julia Hart, and Skye Blue) really want to drown Kris Statlander, Willow Nightingale, and Harley Cameron in toxicity. So decreeth thee, as they challenge for future matches to come. It’s made official later as the latter three appear in a separate backstage segment later.
Willow (c) v. Julia Hart for the TBS Title on Collision, and Statlander (c) v. Thekla for the Women’s World Title on next week’s Dynamite.
FTR (Dax Harwood & Cash Wheeler) v. Alec Price & Jordan Oliver – Tag Team Match
Oh my goodness, helpbigstoke.com is a real website. Big Stoke needs all the help he can get after all, with his lack of height, hair, and hoes. This match was a lot of people’s first introduction to Price and Oliver, and they did not disappoint. There were lots of counters and dives shown from these guys, keeping everyone guessing what could possibly come next. FTR were also doing what they do best, being teamwork-based foils to anyone who dared to gain advantages over them in the ring.
The end of this match saw the Shatter Machine pin Alec Price for the FTR win. The new team just got signed to AEW, so it will be exciting to see some future tag matches with them. Just imagine: them versus Top Flight would cause air traffic control to lose their minds. Or perhaps them versus the Young Bucks to create a New v. Old Guard story? Just some thoughts.
Kenny Omega v. Josh Alexander
Josh targeted Kenny right in the diverticulitis. Along with this, Alexander hit a Kamigoye?! How dare he. Kenny responded in kind with a Snap Dragon Suplex on the concrete floor. This match had such great fluidity with these naturals in the ring hitting all their recognizable maneuvers. Kenny chased off Don Callis at one point, but Callis came back right when Josh got back in control. That little detail was great, demonstrating Don’s scaredy nature.
Kenny won this one with the hyper protected One Winged Angel, not that there was any doubt. After the match, Kenny reaffirmed commitment to winning the AEW World Title for a second time as MJF watched on a monitor backstage in anger. Tonight was a neat little match to put Kenny in a powerful light, presenting him as a worthy name in the World Title picture. However, this once again made Josh Alexander not as big of a deal as he should be.
AEW’s insane roster depth has led to multiple people being lost in the shuffle importance-wise, and sadly Josh Alexander has become one of those people. At least he got to wrestle one of the best wrestlers in the world in Kenny Omega. Let’s just hope he never loses the spot of putting in great work against main event players.
Timeless Love Bombs (Toni Storm & Mina Shirakawa) v. Megan Bayne & Penelope Ford – Tag Team Match
There seems to be a lot of matches tonight where the fists start flying before the bell rings. Toni missed a catch when Bayne threw Mina into her. That landing had to suck. Other than that, the match was fun when it came to the double teaming and chemistry. The eroticism between Toni and Mina just keeps ramping up by the week, all for the love of the sickos!
Bayne and Ford win with the Doomsday Device on Mina, while at the same time Marina Shafir dragged Toni Storm into her Mother’s Milk. Megan Bayne was the one who stood out the most in this match, being presented as a powerful beast with her deadlift German Suplexes and Gorilla Presses. Penelope Ford has more experience and can therefore lead Bayne during their tag matches too. It’s a constant development of success, all the while Marina Shafir devastates the women’s division with her milky hugs of death. All these women’s groups showcased sparks up a question though, are we getting AEW Women’s Trios Titles?
Excalibur does his insanely fast rundown of the upcoming shows. Both AEW Collision this Saturday and AEW Dynamite next Wednesday feature a ton of matches definitely worth checking out. Sometimes, all it takes is great wrestlers wrestling greatly to make an AEW show exciting. And that, in turn, makes the promotion producing these matches successful. It’s always fun when vibes dictate a wrestling show as opposed to numbers on a chart.
As Mark Henry would say, “It’s TIME, for the main event!”
Swerve Strickland v. Kevin Knight
Swerve’s armband says “Profit” on it, he was the producer of Swerve’s AEW themes. There were a lot of wild moves in this match, including a piledriver on the edge of the barricade. Everything was just so smooth with Knight and Swerve having fun out there kicking each other’s heads off. A hurricanrana off the top rope into the Coast to Coast from Knight was a crazy combo, then the UFO Splash connected. But Swerve’s foot just placed itself on the rope at the last moment. Loved that subtle break towards the climax of this one.
Loud “This Is Awesome” chants rang throughout the arena. House Call from Knight, mid air House Call from Swerve, good lord they looked beautiful. Big Pressure to Knight got Swerve the victory in another star-making match for Kevin Knight. The Jet’s rise to the top against main eventers like Swerve, Okada, and Ospreay just keep making him an undeniable fan favorite. He doesn’t even need any crazy character changes or a heel turn to justify a main event run, he simply creates such a connection with the fans.
After the match, Swerve stared down MJF, making him the upteenth person to want to challenge Max for AEW’s top prize. It definitely creates a clamoring for the top goal in the company, which makes wrestling make sense. There is true desperation and determination within the main event scene, and that is super.
