Alan’s Soap Box: How Y&R Can Fix Billy Abbott

How does a character go from beloved legacy character to asshole who gives navel gazing monologues on a podcast? That’s what fans of The Young and the Restless have been wondering as they suffer through Billy Abbott talking about his man-pain endlessly. It wasn’t one decision that resulted in this mess. It has been years of damage that started in 2003 with the retcon of Jill being Katherine’s daughter. Billy was never the same after that story that severed him from first love Mackenzie and started the fuckboy era that never really ended. How does Y&R fix this? I have ideas.

Shut The Fuck Up About Delia

In 2013, when Delia was sacrificed to the Daytime Emmy Gods, Sandra Oh was still on Grey’s Anatomy. Charlize Theron was dating Sean Penn for some unknown reason. Blue Ivy was only a year old. Netflix was just getting into making their own shows. It was nine years ago. Why do I have to still hear about that dead girl constantly?

They’ve squeezed every last bit of dramatic juice from this lemon. We’ve seen every possible iteration of Billy talking about his grief to family members, friends, a therapist, a held-at-gunpoint Adam, and now to himself in podcast form. He’s like Forrest fucking Gump. All you have to do is sit next to Billy and he’ll start telling his tale of woe of the time he left a little girl in a car alone at night with a dog and she ended up getting run over like a squirrel.

If they limited this to once or twice a year mentions like other dead little girl Cassie, fans would tolerate it more. Yet this show insists on picking at the scab constantly. Let it go.

End Billy vs. Adam

Years ago, Billy and Adam made peace over Adam accidentally hitting Delia. When Adam returned in 2019, head writer Josh Griffith ignored that and acted like Delia wasn’t bones now and like her death was still fresh. They tried to make Billy and Adam’s rivalry the new Jack versus Victor. It didn’t work. Jason Thompson and Mark Grossman are talented, but they don’t have great rival chemistry that you could get years of story from.

The writing certainly didn’t do either of them any favors. What was the point of Billy faking being a drunkard for two weeks to try to get Adam to run a story about it? All it accomplished is making Billy look like a loser who can’t even scheme properly. Victor gave Jack’s mentally disturbed ex Patty plastic surgery to terrorize him, and Jack once framed Victor for murder with a forged diary. Let’s stop pretending that Billy and Adam are at that level. They never will be and the show should stop trying.

Stop Making Billy The Focus In His Relationships

It has been a recurring problem that when Billy gets in a relationship, it becomes all about him. Billy is Gladys Knight and the love interest is just a Pip. The woman just exists to support him and suffer from his poor decision making. It happened with Victoria when most of the drama was about him being a gambling addict and cheater with endless man-pain. Victoria, one of the most important characters in this show’s history, was a sidekick in her own pairing.

It is currently happening with Lily. She’s either being Billy’s bang therapist who has to assure him he’s great despite all evidence to the contrary or she’s dealing with whatever problem he created. The relationship is never about her. Even her becoming CEO of Chancellor ended up being about Billy’s damn feelings. It is frustrating.

I don’t think it is too much to ask for a woman to get a point of view and story focus in her pairing. It is the bare minimum. Fans would vastly prefer to see Lily have a story rather than just talking with Billy about how healing his podcast is for him. Y&R in general has been too male focused the last few years, but this is a glaring issue.

Write Him Off For Three Months

It is unfortunate, but I do think fans are so annoyed with Billy that it would be best to have him go to Hong Kong for three months. The show has enough Abbotts with Kyle back and Allie moving to Genoa City soon. Billy could be rested for a bit and it wouldn’t hurt the show at all. Having him be gone could let fans begin to miss him and then they could start fresh when he returns with less man-pain and hopefully no podcasting.

The only risk is Jason Thompson would likely be taken off contract in this scenario and thus would open the door to him joining another show or telling them to fuck off when they want him back. In that eventuality, Y&R could just recast Billy again. I know there’s multiple failed Billy recasts. Ryan Brown, Scott Seymour, David Tom when he returned to do a lispsy Billy Miller impersonation, and old man Burgess Jenkins were all failures.

I wouldn’t be that worried about it. There’s no room at GH for Jason Thompson right now since the money that freed up from the anti-vaxxers being fired has been spent. Days has enough people in that age range. Even if Jason didn’t want to return, there’s plenty of out of work actors in LA that could play Billy Abbott. Recasting has been the traditional soap way to reboot a character, so it wouldn’t be the end of the world.

Bring Billy Back To Jabot

No one gives a fuck about Billy at Chancellor. He should be at the family company with Jack, Ashley, Kyle, and likely Allie soon. I know we got tired of the musical chairs of CEOs at Jabot, but it is time to bring that set back and let the Abbotts work there. Abby can continue serving quesadillas since the Newmans and the Abbotts don’t give a fuck about her. Billy is a piece of shit, but at least he’s in the know about Ashland faking his cancer and Diane being alive.

Have Kyle Be Billy’s Rival

During Mal Young’s mixed bag tenure as executive producer and head writer, Kyle luring Billy into gambling again as a power play was one of the highlights. It was good drama, and I think they should revisit it. It makes way more dramatic sense than Billy’s rivalry with Adam. Pitting family members against each other would help reinvigorate the Abbott family and set the show on fire.

If Billy returned to Jabot, he would be working for his nephew Kyle, who is co-CEO with Jack. I don’t think Billy would enjoy answering to a man who only exists because Nikki switched Victor’s jizz out for Jack’s jizz during Kay Alden’s infamous Jizz War story. He would find it insulting and just look for opportunities to undermine him.

There’s also the Diane factor. You could have her function as a Lady Macbeth type, encouraging her son to handle any challenges to his power at Jabot. It could be an all out war if Y&R would just write it. I want to see chairs being hurled through windows again at those offices.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JcRw8lW97j0

Have Johnny Find Out Chelsea Is His Biological Mother

Another avenue for drama is that Johnny doesn’t know that grandpa Victor had Chelsea drug and rape Billy which resulted in his conception. If that came out, it would send Johnny’s world spinning and give Billy a chance to play scenes with his alive child and not the super dead one that he only seems to care about. It would also give story to adoptive mother Victoria because I’m sure Johnny would play the “You’re not my real mom!” card quick.

I know the typical head writer’s instinct for this story would be to use it to reunite Billy and Victoria, but they shouldn’t go in that direction. Those two have been done to death and they need to just be co-parents. It would work as a family drama as they reckon with Johnny’s emotions about his conception and Chelsea trying to spend time with him as Victoria threatens her with the wrath of god to stay away from her son.

A story like this would use past history in a smart way. Unlike Delia, this history hasn’t been mined for a story. A big part of why Billy sucks now is he’s been stuck in the past for years. Using past history with a child that’s actually alive could propel Billy forward and get him out of this insufferable pattern. This show needs to focus on the future and let the stories that have already been told go.

Dispatches From Soap Land

*Michael on GH can forgive Sonny for murder, but he draws the line at nutting in a woman that isn’t Carly? Okay. Sure.

*If B&B is trying to reignite Carter and Quinn, it is going to take a lot to get the bad taste out of fans’ mouths from the Outsourced Cock story. It is all I think about when I see them. I think the only way to make up for it is to have Eric walk in on them doing standing 69 and promptly die from a heart attack. It is the fairest solution.

*I’m glad Days is having the twentysomethings be messy and have sex with each other, but what is the endgame? Polyamory? Johnny gets Chanel on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, and his twin sister Allie gets her on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday? Tripp gets her on Sunday?

*Sharon Case and Amelia Heinle did excellent work on Y&R last week. I don’t know how long this show is going to be watchable for, but I’m going to enjoy it while it lasts.