Recent shows like Fallout and The Last of Us have signaled a sharp rise in quality for video game adaptations, distancing us from those god-awful movies of the past…like Rampage or Max Payne. Sadly, though, Borderlands takes us right back to those infamous days by delivering a film that’s fun for no one—newbies and longtime fans alike.
The film’s setting of Pandora, an apocalyptic planet where vault hunters search for ancient power and treasure by slaughtering anyone who gets in their path, seems like the right place for an action-packed blockbuster. However, it’s a bland backdrop for the mildest of thrills, and where the thinnest of characters embark on a generic journey. This version of Pandora is one of the most uninteresting and shallow settings you’ll see this year. Although it’s littered with signage and propaganda that’s supposed to mean something, the film never spends much time exploring its locations or developing its lore. Not to mention, its sense of chaos isn’t felt on the surface or in its action.
The worst thing anyone can say about a summer blockbuster is that it’s boring, but that’s totally fitting in this case. The action rarely produces any memorable kills, sequences, or stunts. There aren’t any instances where the characters really get their own spotlight to kick-ass. Not to mention, big action set pieces are generally hampered by terrible-looking CGI that doesn’t belong in a film of this scale or budget. Borderlands is one of the dullest action experiences of the year and might feature the tamest bloodshed in director Eli Roth’s career.
The characters are equally as unremarkable and come equipped with lackluster motives and unfunny personalities. Lilith (Cate Blanchett)—a bounty hunter who reluctantly joins the group to escape the wrath of her nefarious CEO employer, Atlas (Edgar Ramirez)—has main character energy but no depth. Her constant gripes about being referred to as a vault hunter are annoying and her backstory is the recycled hidden destiny arc we’ve seen dozens of times. The narration she’s forced to do comes off incredibly lazy and while the trajectory of her story should be interesting, it’s not because it’s clumsily constructed. It struggles to find a place in this already choppy narrative and barely boasts any believable emotion.
Worst of all, Blanchett looks like she doesn’t want to be there—which sadly isn’t a unique critique when it comes to this cast. Frankly, no one seems interested in what’s happening and it makes for a tonal mess. The main group has no chemistry whatsoever and, outside of Lilith, no meaningful arcs that make them stand apart. Kevin Hart especially seems unhappy to play a more “serious-type” character like Roland and has a perma-frown stapled to his face. Everyone else acts as failed comedic relief, with jokes that don’t hit and personalities that compete rather than neatly coexist.
Now, that’s what the average moviegoer won’t get out of Borderlands. For longtime fans of Gearbox’s iconic loot shooter series, it’s all that and worse. Every fear surrounding the film’s PG-13 rating and lack of identity are validated within the opening moments. Despite boasting a lot of the first game’s story and introductory feel, this movie desperately wants to be Borderlands 2—the most highly-regarded entry of the franchise. Atlas is a Handsome Jack wannabe who doesn’t come close to capturing the all-time great villain’s presence, wit, or brand of evil. There are characters like Krieg (Florian Munteanu) who contribute nothing whatsoever, while more pivotal characters from the first game like Mordecai and Brick are excluded entirely. Even Tiny Tina (Ariana Greenblatt), a fan-favorite side character, being more heavily involved as a main character doesn’t help the film because she’s a watered-down version of herself.
Tina and Claptrap (Jack Black), everyone’s beloved or maligned chatty android, have their backstories changed in ways that make them less interesting and are stripped of their distinct approach to insanity. Their unique humor is thrown away for terrible one-liners the actors barely seem interested in uttering. It’s such a sin to see two genuinely iconic characters like Tina and Claptrap be so one-note, and the character complexity of the games is gone—largely because it doesn’t have the robust supporting cast it should. Pandora is supposed to be so filled to the brim with characters and stories that everyone kind of has their own role in the story. Here, though, that’s not the case and it’s a big reason the film is so empty-feeling.
Outside of the sheer mishandling of characters, the basic identifying traits of Borderlands are completely absent. For a game all about tripping over weird and wild guns, the variety of weapons is dreadfully slim. Stylistically, it’s bizarre that this film doesn’t use the poppy character introductions of the games to instill some life. The flourish of color and jokey taglines would’ve instantly drawn audiences into the movie and without them, this film has zero flair. There aren’t even many cool easter eggs or nods that fans will find—mainly because it feels like the film doesn’t want to celebrate its source material in any meaningful way. Plus, the PG-13 rating basically ensures that the crude, foul-mouthed nature of the characters and body-part exploding action can’t exist, which is incredibly frustrating.
The only big takeaway from Borderlands is that fans deserve better. It’s a video game adaptation that doesn’t understand what makes the source material special and opts to make a subpar blockbuster that won’t entice general audiences either. It’s disappointing on every level and a bizarre misfire that ranks among the worst video game movies in recent history—maybe of all-time.
