Pop 5: Muppets

daniel cohen looks at his favorite Muppets …

Ah, the Muppets. When I decided to count down my Top 5 favorite Muppet characters, I should have known the difficulties it would entail. There are so many great Muppets to choose from.

Unfortunately, some had to get left out. I would imagine this is a slightly unconventional Muppet Top 5, as I leave out some big names, but ultimately, I went with the ones that mean the most to me.

But without further ado, it’s time to start the countdown, on my Muppet list tonight.

5. Statler and Waldorf

I guess I can relate to these guys, as I sometimes consider myself a crotchety old cynic. But in fairness, these guys are always funny. They rarely get extended screen time, and are used in spurts, but that’s where their strength lies. I think if you had an entire episode or movie focusing on Statler and Waldorf, they would probably get stale. Statler and Waldorf are the goal line running backs of the Muppets: They go in for one play, but always score the touchdown.

4. Beaker

Beaker makes this list almost entirely on his appearance. Just look at that crazy bastard — he’s hysterical! Poor Beaker is constantly nervous, and usually a complete train wreck. I have no idea why the brilliant Dr. Bunsen Honeydew would even hire him as a lab assistant. He’s a walking disaster who consistently gets into catastrophic situations. There was one time when Beaker got copied, and there were like a hundred Beakers running around…that was pretty ridiculous.

3. Kermit The Frog

The leader and heart of the Muppets. The Muppets clearly would not exist without Kermit. Kermit is never really that funny, but his brilliance is playing off the shenanigans of the other characters, and nobody does it better than him. It’s not easy being green, and it’s certainly not easy being surrounded by complete wackos, as well a high maintenance girlfriend in Miss Piggy.

2. Fozzie Bear

Fozzie is just a really, really likable guy that for some reason I connected with most growing up. While he’s some times prone to disasters and screw ups like a Gonzo or Animal, he’s often overseeing everything along with Kermit, except that Fozzie will give you more sarcastic and funny commentary, whereas Kermit runs around trying to fix the situation. He’s kind of like the Jerry Seinfeld of the group, but more loyal and caring.

1. Animal

The reason why Animal is No. 1 is simple: He makes me laugh the most. Whether he’s going crazy on the drums, or shouting ‘Woman’ every five minutes, Animal is guaranteed to provide me with at least a chuckle every time he’s on screen. Animal is also responsible for my all time favorite Muppet moment in which he keeps interrupting Rita Moreno’s ‘Fever’ with annoying drum solos. Oh, Animal. You’re the best.