Alan’s Soap Box: The 10 Best Current Soap Characters

Written by Alan Sarapa

What makes a character good? It varies. They could be entertaining. They could be an antagonist who is just a wrecking ball across the canvas. They could be a heroine who makes self-destructive choices. They could just be a matriarch with a warm presence that feels like a hug. Whatever archetype the character is, the thing they all ultimately have in common is that they add value to the show. I think these 10 characters add value to their shows and are the best current soap characters based on what is airing lately. I know this is subjective, so some of you are going to be like “Wow. Alan is on crack.” You can go make your own list if you want. I’m not stopping you.

10. Paris, B&B

I really struggled with picking any character from The Bold and the Beautiful for this list. Almost all of them are either terrible or so dumb that it is impossible to root for them. You can’t pick Brooke because all she does is encourage Hope to go back to the emotionally abusive cheater Liam. You can’t pick Wyatt because he went from good guy to simping for noted baby-thief Flo. Finn is nice, but he could die tomorrow and I’d be like, “Well, that happened!” Being the best character on B&B is a bit like being the prettiest person in the burn unit, but I did pick one.

Paris has goals and a personality. Paris has a backbone. Paris feels like a person you could hang out with. This is in stark contrast to her terrible sister Zoe who goes around making unreasonable demands and isn’t even an interesting antagonist. Paris is the only thing making that story watchable. And it is highly likely Paris will be gone in six months because Brad Bell has the attention span of a five-year-old distance-learning on Zoom. Though the five-year-old could probably write a better soap than him.

9. Cameron, GH

William Lipton is killing it. From learning Franco is dead to the scene in the morgue, you felt every bit of Cameron’s pain. Cameron hasn’t had a consistent father figure since Lucky went off to be a bummer in various countries. Liz has had boyfriends since then. From AJ to Liz’s bang-maid Drew, none of them lasted until Franco. Cameron was reluctant to accept Franco, but that changed after Franco saved Cameron from getting uploaded with Drew’s memories. Cameron became a Franco stan and that was very endearing even if my feelings about Franco could be best summed up as ambivalent. Cameron was the one making that family unit interesting to me, so I was invested in his grief.

I loved the song Cameron performed “We Weren’t Done With This Yet” (which was also written by William Lipton). Original songs on shows are usually varying degrees of terrible, but I’m getting spoiled with William Lipton’s songs. He’s so talented that I think it is inevitable that he will leave GH. I just hope the next Cameron is half as good as him.

8. Olivia, GH

I’m going to be honest: I never was a big Olivia fan. I liked it when she was tripping balls on LSD when Heather shot her up with it. Other than that, I didn’t really care. Olivia could have been pecked to death by rampaging chickens taking over the Metro Court and I would have looked up from my phone, giggled, and then went back to checking my email. Olivia was irrelevant to my interests.

My opinion has changed so much in the past year. Olivia was so fun on that adventure with Robert. Who knew holding an uzi was all it would take to get me to like a character? Kidding. Lisa LoCicero is delightful and very versatile. She can do Bond lite adventure stories. She can do dramatic domestic stories like Olivia’s marital woes with Ned. I didn’t appreciate Lisa’s talent before, but I do now.

I think one of the big reasons my opinion changed is GH started treating Olivia like an actual character. She has a point of view now. She isn’t just a busybody who feels like she should be in a commercial for pasta. She’s a mother and a wife, but she also liked the excitement of being on an adventure. I understand Olivia more now and I’m no longer meh on her. It is always a nice surprise when your opinion of a character changes.

7. Marlena, Days

Marlena always makes every scene she’s in better. It could be that terrible Allie rape story or scenes where she’s counseling Ben about the Ciara situation. Fans will watch it for Marlena. Not many soap characters have that power. And Days knows she has that power. Deidre Hall was in the most episodes of anyone on Days in 2020.

I think the way they use Marlena is very smart. She could be supporting a family member like granddaughter Claire or in shrink mode with a patient or concerned about John’s anger issues after his stroke. She doesn’t get as much story focus as she did in the ‘90s, but her presence is still very felt. Most soap fans know once a character is over 70 years old that they won’t get the story focus they used to get, but they want those characters to be utilized. Days has done that. I’d say Marlena is the best matriarch of the four soaps because she continues to be relevant and overwhelmingly popular. Marlena is the queen and everyone knows it.

6. Chelsea, Y&R

I’ve never liked Chelsea. From when she came to town pregnant with Billy’s baby after raping him to the years when Y&R tried to pretend she was a heroine, Chelsea annoyed me. Until now. I’m very much enjoying Chelsea’s villainess turn. It feels earned, and Melissa Claire Egan is killing it.

Chelsea’s wicked turn has come after suffering a stroke when she finds out Adam kissed his ex-wife Sharon. This led to her pretending she’s still wheelchair-bound and enlisting bestie Chloe to poison Sharon’s cop husband Rey and framing Adam for it. It is deliciously evil and I’m here for it!

Chelsea has forgiven Adam for so many things. She forgave him for pretending to be Gabriel Bingham after his second explosion death. She forgave him for having her kidnapped when he was plotting to blow up his family. She forgave him for shutting off the power in the Chance Comms building, leading to her accident in the elevator which led to her stroke. All that, and he kisses Sharon. I’d be out for blood if I were her too.

I hope Y&R continues using Chelsea in this way. Let her be bad!

5. Sharon, Y&R

Sharon is the quintessential heroine. She is a kind person, but she is drawn to well-endowed men of questionable moral character. Her husband Rey is nice to her. I’m sure he always leaves the toilet seat down and doesn’t use her shampoo, but she doesn’t have passion for him. On paper, she should want Rey more than Adam. Though we all know what the heart and cooter want isn’t always logical.

It is classic soap for a married woman to want a man no one (except fans) wants her to be with. When you add in Chelsea having Rey poisoned, it is very enjoyable. Sharon Case plays the struggle beautifully. Sharon does care about Rey, but not in the way he loves her. Sharon likes to lie to herself, but this situation is already untenable and bound to explode soon.

Sharon doesn’t just have relationship drama to deal with. Her daughter Faith has been bullied and has been drinking underage. Spoiler alert: Faith gets in a car accident this week. This storyline is obviously meant to parallel the death of Sharon’s firstborn Cassie. I don’t think Faith is going to die, but it should be very dramatic.

4. Abigail, Days

During Marci Miller’s last stint as Abigail, I found her to be very sedate. Her acting wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t what I expected from soaps. Well, Marci returned last year and shut me up. Abby was a reactive character before. Things just happened to her and Marci played her as a serene victim. Now Marci is on fire! It isn’t just the writing. Marci has a ton of energy in scenes. It is like night and day from her last tenure in the role. Marci is eating up every scene she’s in and she’s very close to becoming my favorite Abigail.

Abby is one of the reasons to watch Days. From her reading Chad for filth for cheating on her with newly found half-sister Gwen, to actually kidnapping Gwen and threatening to fry her brains with the same drug Gwen used on her last year, it is really enjoyable. Abby is no longer a passive victim. She’s taking charge in her life, and it is beautiful to see.

3. Amanda, Y&R

Coming on as the twin of a popular dead character is tricky. They can’t be played exactly the same or it will be like “Why didn’t you just bring on the dead character? Say Santa Claus kidnapped them and keep it moving.” They also can’t be so different that they can’t fill spaces in the canvas the previous character once filled. I think Mishael Morgan finds that balance perfectly.

Amanda is different. Hilary was dramatic and in your face. Amanda is more controlled, but she’s firm and doesn’t put up with BS. It is fascinating to watch and compare the way Mishael plays Amanda versus what she did with Hilary. She has range!

Amanda works as a character because you care about her feelings. When she’s unleashing on biological mother Naya for abandoning her and Hilary and never looking back, you are rooting for her. You feel the loneliness and abandonment that Amanda felt in foster care. You want her to be happy.

Of course, happiness doesn’t look like it is going to happen for our Amanda anytime soon. Billionaire hoe Devon cheated on her with Elena and bio mom Naya wants her to represent her biological grandfather who has been charged with killing Amanda’s biological father. Can Y&R let the socially distancing stop for a scene or two so Amanda can slap these people? Please?

2. Nina, GH

GH has let Cynthia Watros out to play! She’s one of the greatest soap actresses ever, but they hadn’t been using her to her full potential until now. The scenes where Nina learned currently-dead Nelle was her daughter were heartbreaking and then the heartbreak led to fury. She unleashed on 50-year-old mean girl Carly and boyfriend Jax for keeping this information from her. It was very satisfying.

Now Carly wants to keep Nina from her grandson Wiley and because Michael is a word I’m not going to use in this column, he said “Yes, Mommy! Whatever you say! My child is your child! This show is trying to make me seem like a leading man, but I’m completely spineless! Hmmm. My boogers taste good!”

Nina had the good luck of finding out Carly’s husband Sonny is alive with amnesia, being the house-elf to a kindly Black couple who own a bar. Nina was going to tell her that Sonny was alive, but Carly decided to be heinous and now she isn’t going to know. I swear Carly could turn any conversation hostile. A Girl Scout could offer her to sell her a box of Thin Mints and Carly would yell at her for not having Do-si-dos. “Do I look like a Thin Mints person, little girl?!”

This is very exciting because it is giving Cynthia Watros the material she deserves and it involves making Carly suffer. It is a win-win.

1. Paulina, Days

To say Jackee Harry has been hilarious and a joy to watch would be an understatement. She isn’t a scene-stealer. She owns the scene. It has her name on it. It’s laminated and everything. The other actors are aware the scene is hers and keep up while basking in her greatness. You can tell how much they are enjoying it.

Paulina is a wealthy, blunt woman and proud of it. She says the things that the fans have been saying. Like asking why they’d name baby Jules after an old white woman or riffing  on how white Salem is. Every scene has been delightful and I’d encourage you to watch it on Peacock or on the Days app if you haven’t already.

I think this is the most Black characters Days has ever had: Abe, Lani, Eli, Theo, Valerie, Paulina, and Chanel. It is sad that it took until 2021 to have seven Black characters on at the same time, but progress is progress.

Speaking of Chanel, she just got there, but I’m already enjoying her relationship with her mother Paulina. Chanel is a spoiled brat, and Paulina is tired of it. She even cut Chanel off and used her “I am your mother!” voice. I can already tell this is going to be a fun story.

Jackee is on contract, but I don’t know how long this stint is. I’m going to enjoy it as long as it lasts because she is brilliant in this role.

Dispatches from Soap Land:

*I really hope GH isn’t planning a baby switch with Maxie and Brook Lynn. The last baby switch was revealed a year ago. It is way too soon for another one. Baby switches aren’t like murder stories. You have to space them out.

*B&B is about to do a murder mystery. The victim is probably going to be himbo Vinny, and it is going to be pointless.

*The surrogacy story on Y&R is painful to watch. I’d rather watch Jack be replaced by a Peruvian doppelganger again than watch this.

*Days has supposedly recast EJ according to Thaao Penghlis. Hopefully it’s a good recast because EJ needs to show bubble butt Chad and sitcom husband Jake how to be a DiMera.