Written by Matthew Widdis
Becky Lynch drives into the arena to audible chants of “Beck-y! Beck-y!” Kayla Braxton wants to ask her if she’s ready for Asuka but Becky says she’ll answer that in the ring. She tosses her keys at Kayla and also a sarcastic “Nice catch” as they hit the ground. As she walks through the parking garage and into the backstage area, she comes across Heavy Machinery and The New Day who have a table set up with a blender to make egg and tuna pancake protein shakes for some reason. Otis Dozovic takes a long pull (eggshells and all) to the shock and disgust of The New Day. No takers from The New Day but all five are awestruck as Becky comes up and asks for a swig. She replies that it’s a bit weak and saunters on.
Becky is out to the ring and the fans pop when The Man comes around. Becky says that the whole roster is trying to bad ass since she broke through. They think it’s easy to generate buzz, connect with the fans, and get to the top… until they try it for themselves. People say she’s all hype but what about Asuka’s hype? A year ago, she was unbeatable but one loss to Charlotte Flair and she fell off. Asuka comes out to compare Becky to a bee: all buzz but no sting.
This brings out The IIconics and Peyton and Billie admonish Asuka for her lack of “champion’s class and dignity. They go on to say that Becky is a bully and bosses people around; typical “for a man.” Becky says to Asuka that she’ll prove herself right now and asks which IIconic wants to step up.
Becky Lynch vs Peyton Royce
Becky opens up with a throat punch and starts looking for a quick win with rollup and a half-hearted attempt to lock in the Dis-Arm-Her. Becky keeps working the arm and gives a noogie for good measure. Asuka looks on and, backstage, so is Lacey Evans. After a quick dip outside, Peyton manages to shift momentum and pours it on with the stretching and the clobbering. Becky fights back and hits a flying forearm off the second turnbuckle. Peyton powders again and gets a screen play clothesline in on the Man when Becky pulls Billie Kaye away from her. Becky’s impulsiveness is leaving holes in her game and Peyton is making it a fight. The IIconic even manages to stretch out a turning heel kick to Becky’s dome while she’d climbing the ropes. Eventually, Becky small packages Peyton and rolls it through for the Dis-Arm-Her.
Winner by submission: The Man
Asuka is incensed by Becky’s win and grabs Billie Kaye by the hair for an impromptu (and non-consensual?) match.
Asuka vs Billie Kaye
A hip attack and a low dropkick keep Billie down. Asuka puts Billie in the Dis-Arm-Her and mocks Becky but is schoolgirled for a two count. Right out of the kick out, Asuka Lock applied.
Becky gets in the ring to stare down Asuka but AJ Styles’ music hits. The Phenomenal One comes down to the ring… and out into crowd and out to the concourse? AJ is at the refreshment stand, setting the fans up with hot dogs and popcorn and sodas. He says that the fans work hard for their money so they can spend it how they like. But, tonight, the food and the merch are on him and he starts handing out AJ Styles T-shirts. One of those “fans” isn’t a fan! It’s Daniel Bryan! He attacks AJ but AJ hits a spinebuster through the hot dog table and is raining down right hands when security pulls them apart.
Backstage
The Usos are in a photoshoot when a package arrives for Jimmy. He thinks it may be an early anniversary present from Naomi. The card says it’s from a naughty girl who needs to be locked up in the Uso penitentiary but it’s signed by Mandy Rose! There’s a hotel room key inside and Jey asks Jimmy what he’s going to do. He says he doesn’t know. (Helpful hint: “I don’t know” is a bad way to answer that question under those circumstances.)
Samoa Joe is walking through the backstage area and comes across an old TNA rival, EC3, checking himself out in the mirror.
Mixed Match Challenge Check-in
R-Truth and Carmella spend their “all-expenses paid” free vacation visiting the cultural “epic center” of the sports entertainment world, WWE headquarters in Stamford, CT.
Backstage
Kayla asks Andrade “Cien” Almas how he’s prepared to face Rey Mysterio. Almas and Zelina Vega say that Rey Rey was un idolo a El Idolo but it’s time to look forward to the future.
Samoa Joe vs Mustafa Ali
Ali climbs the turnbuckle to play to the fans but, before his music stops or even the lights coming back on, he’s ripping down by Samoa Joe. Joe whips him into the corner and hits the running back elbow and Enzi-Pele kick. Ali is out to the floor and Joe runs him into ringpost. Referees call for the bell and Joe is backed off but he returns to beat on Ali some more, driving him into a ringpost a second time. He screams at Ali if he “understands” and walks off once he’s satisfied that he does. Joe runs down one more time and teases a powerbomb through the announce table but tosses Mustafa Ali into the barricade instead. Now, it’s over and Joe has a twitch of a smile as he leaves.
Winner: No Contest
Backstage
Sonya Deville asks Mandy Rose if she really wants to do this; giving someone your room key is scandalous. Mandy says that’s point. She doesn’t like Naomi and all of this is to make her miserable. She goes off for her “date” and even Sonya looks like she’s had enough of it.
Rey Mysterio is walking to gorilla while Nikki Cross is rattling a chain link fence and asking him to “play.”
Kayla Braxton asks Samoa Joe what provoked him to attack Mustafa Ali. He says that it’s not an attack; it’s a statement. He’s going to win the Rumble and he’s going to do what he did to Mustafa Ali to 29 other men to do it.
Rey Mysterio vs Andrade “Cien” Almas w/Zelina Vega
As Rey walks out to the ring, I nod in approval at the fan that brought a “Victoria for HoF” sign.
This match is everything you’d expect it to be and I encourage everyone, if you watch just one match on this show on any show this week, this is it. We see classic lucha libre action throughout, lots of second rope rebounds and mid-air reversals. Andrade gets to play the big man in this, countering rey with strength moves and even hitting a sit out powerbomb on the arena floor.
They redo the “Mexican Destroyer” from last week but not before we see one of the most amazing hurricanranas I’ve ever seen in a WWE ring and both men barely beating the ten count. After multiple attempts to hit the 619, Rey gets it and goes up top to drop the dime but Zelina gets on the apron. A half second distraction brings Rey down to the ringpost and Andrade hits a draping hammerlock DDT from the top turnbuckle. El Idolo pins the legend.
Winner by pinfall: Andrade “Cien” Almas
The announce team recaps earlier events from the evening and only just now am I savvy enough to suspect a Mandy/Jimmy/Naomi angle and Temptation Island cross-marketing connection. We see Jimmy Uso walking through a hotel hallway and standing outside a door with a key in his hand. We cut to commercial (say what you want but that’s just smart TV right there) and, when we come back, he’s unlocking the door and going in.
Mandy is sitting down in a short satin robe. She reveals black lingerie underneath and tells him that the time to play hard to get is over. Jimmy’s a righteous man, though, and he shuts her down. He puts his hand out and a wild photographer appears! Mandy tells him that it was never about him. The whole set up was about her hatred of Naomi and how she just wants to ruin her life. Jimmy nods and steps out. Naomi steps in and the fight is on. Mandy manages to get away after tossing Naomi into a chair and jimmy comes back in to check on his wife.
Replay from Monday Night RAW reveals the new WWE Tag Team Championship belts and announces an Elimination Chamber match between six teams (TBD) to crown the inaugural champs. Champ, Rusev, vs Shinsuke Nakamura for the US title and Finn Balor title match vs Universal champion, Brock Lesnar, are announced for Royal Rumble.
In ring
The Miz comes down to party and Shane McMahon’s “Bestie Birthday Bash” is about to start! After Corey Graves is done calling out each member of the Mean Street Posse for not being able to party like Miz and dropping a reference towards former WWE RAW Tag team champion Nicholas, Miz wishes Shane a happy birthday and Shane thanks him and Birmingham. Shane mentions that he’s usually apprehensive towards in-ring birthday parties. Miz assures him that it’s all good with a Jordan commercial, a Shane-O-Mac (and Miz) highlight video, and, not one, but two cakes from his favorite bakery. Shane thanks Miz for opening up about his past and, now, he wants to share that he always dreamed of being a tag team champion. Miz tells him that the dream will come true at Royal Rumble and leads the crowd in singing Happy Birthday.
This brings out The Bar. They try picking on Shane but he turns it back on them. He says that, since Sheamus gave Miz a Brogue Kick sucker shot last week, he and Miz can have a match right here and right now. Miz is hesitant since he’s in street clothes but Shane pumps him up with a pep talk and it is go time!
Sheamus vs The Miz
The cakes are moved to ringside… waiting. After a few cake crash close calls, Sheamus sets himself to beasting Miz about the ring. Miz turns it around for a bit but Sheamus puts the brakes on Miz’s running dropkicks. When the ref backs Sheamus off at the ropes, Cesaro comes in for a cheap shot on Miz but Shane yanks him off the apron and through the chocolate cake table! Sheamus starts to get after Shane but Miz catches him for a schoolboy and a pinfall win!
Winner by pinfall: The Miz
A frustrated Sheamus starts putting the boots to Miz and Shane runs to the rescue. Punches in bunches and a leaping back elbow from Shane sets up a Skull-Crushing Finale. The A-Lister and the SmackDown commish set Sheamus and the vanilla cake in the corner. It’s a birthday coast-to-coast and The Best Tag Team in the World celebrates with their joint custody trophy.
Final thoughts: We are now one SmackDown away from Royal Rumble in Phoenix and the blue brand’s trajectory seems locked. I’m still a bit underwhelmed by Daniel Bryan and AJ Styles’ feud but I’m sure the in-ring result will be great. On that note, Andrade Almas may have finally “arrived” on the SmackDown roster. El Idolo spent much of 2018 putting on incredible matches and losing. It was starting to get predictable. Getting the rub from Rey Mysterio this week was one hell of a tap on the shoulder.
Becky Lynch’s new in-ring style works for the character but the match quality improves when she gets going and slips into her comfort zone. The feud and with Asuka seems problematic. The real drama is with Ronda. A Becky loss at Rumble and she loses momentum. A win and she likely doesn’t face Ronda at ‘Mania.
The Mandy Rose and Naomi bit is some role reversal from the old day in that the man was the poker chip in a female feud and it shows their confidence in Mandy going forward.
The NXT callup appearances were a good job of “show, don’t tell” and gives the folks at home a good feel for who they’re getting.
Samoa Joe’s quasi-squash of Mustafa Ali teases a good showing, if not a win at Royal Rumble.
Wrestlemania season officially begins with the Shane/Miz vs The Bar. The result and/or fallout from that match will let us know what we’re looking at going forward because a Shane vs Miz blood feud is just the sort of thing that WrestleMania is for.
