This was a really odd pay-per-view, but in a good way. A lot of surprises and a very thought-provoking order of matches.
The pre-show featured a strange segment with Curt Hawkins, announcing his first match will be Tuesday on SmackDown. I think I want to like him, but I’m not sure. I think I need an adult. The pre-show match featured American Alpha and Hype Bros defeating The Ascension and The Vaudevillians. It kills me to see the Vaudevillians being bona-fide jobbers. Hype Bros suck. I like Ryder, hate Rawley. Ascension should be future endeavored. Alpha need to have better matches soon.
Booker T is nearly unintelligible.
As leaked online, the main event KICKED OFF the show. The WWE Championship Match was the OPENING MATCH of the night. It was a great. AJ Styles retained the WWE World Championship against John Cena and Dean Ambrose. Fantastic bout, great back and forth, fluid, and some great three-man spots. The end of the match was a bit strange, with Styles tapping out to simultaneous submissions but despite tapping, the match continued. Cena appeared to have Ambrose ready for defeat, until Styles reentered with some hard chair shots, pinning Cena.
Nikki Bella defeated Carmella in a terrible, terrible match. I have nothing to say about this. Nothing.
In a match, no idea what to expect, I was very happy to see an awesome match. I am getting into the Usos new badassery, definitely a plus. Rhyno and Heath Slater saddled the comedy tonight and were a strong team. Great match which sees Rhyno and Slater defeat The Usos to retain the SmackDown Tag Team Championships. How you ask? Three words. Gore! Gore! Gore!
Bacon Rorbin defeated Jack Swagger. This, was a surprisingly good match. If Swagger is going to continue on SmackDown, now would be a good time, a very good time for him to get prepackaged, re-gimmicked, re-something. It’s time for Swagger to move on from “We the People” and find something to rejuvenate his career. I will give credit to Baron Corbin… Much better, just needs a bit more direction and we could have something solid.
Ladies and Gentlemen. This was the main event. The show should have closed with the WWE Intercontinental Championship match. This was easily a showstealer. Miz and Ziggler, put on one hell of a performance. I won’t go as far as to say the match of a lifetime, but I will say this match came pretty damn close. A ton of near falls, close calls, some sick bumps, counters, and outside interference from Maryse, who is reminding me of Sensational Sherri, and Spirit Squad members Mikey and Kenny. After losing a boot, eating the metal of a corner, multiple face-crushing finishers, countering with superkicks, roll ups, sleepers… The referee finally ejects Maryse and the Spirit Squad from the ring, allowing Dolph Ziggler to blast The Miz with a superkick, pinning and winning the WWE Intercontinental Championship. Again, this was an incredible match, Ziggler and Miz really told a great story in the ring. It is a damn shame this was not the final match, it would have been the perfect conclusion, it would have been a satisfying ending to a pretty solid show overall. Instead, we have two more matches.
Alexa Bliss looks like she was bestowed the Chrome for the War Boys in Mad Max: Fury Road, while Becky’s substitution, Naomi, is wearing a visor stolen from LeVar Burton’s Star Trek closet. Chants of “We want Becky” broke out early, this match maybe could have been better, but Naomi just isn’t as talented as she looks, and it was apparent tonight. That stupid multiple kicking thing is so damn annoying. What’s more infuriating, is after spending a few weeks building her up to be a legitimate contender, Naomi rolls up Alexa Bliss for the pinfall victory.
Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton
Sigh. I had a difficult time watching this. Before the match, Orton stares into a mirror, which starts twisting his face. Vigo? Is it you? I would have been fine if the show ended with Bliss and Naomi, Swagger vs. Bacon Rorbin, or hell, I would have taken the uneventful Curt Hawkins promo over this. After a high note with Ziggler and Miz, this was unsalvageable. There was nothing gain or lost here. Wyatt has been in main event after main event, but yet still never given a major championship chance. He’ll just go onto feud with someone else, but will never move forwards towards titles. What is his purpose now? He dominated the match with rest hold after rest hold.
We got two decent spots. One, Wyatt missing a senton onto the ring stairs. Ouch. Second, finally, finally, finally… LUKE HARPER IS BACK! The distraction allowed Bray Wyatt to splatter Orton with the Sister Abigail, and hopefully, this feud is over. I’ll accept that finish.
